To Prove You're Not a Robot

Word Verification. Ugh.

Normally, I'd say 'Nuff Said.  Except, sadly, it's not.  I HATE HATE HATE these...

And while these ones above seem "easy" to read, some are not.  There are times I want to make a witty and clever comment on a blog (which I know you are just dying to read) and I have to go through 2 or 3 sets of word verifications just to prove that I am not a robot.  It used to only require one word, but now it requires 2 each time.  Talk about frustrating.  It's even worse if you are trying to comment from a phone.

I didn't used to require word verification on my own posts, that is until I started receiving a plethora of comments that looked like this:

 我愛他 

It was getting rather annoying having to continuously "delete forever" these types of comments.  I would also get many comments such as, "Your blog is much appreciation. Follow please my blog for business networks. [blog address here]."  One thing I hate more than being outsourced is the outsourcerers tracking me down!  Bleh.  Needless to say, I turned on the word verification "security" feature and the aforementioned type comments came to a screeching halt.

However, in trying to be better at staying current with all of the blog posts, this requires me to be able to read the blogs I follow and leave an appropriate comment (because how else will they know I've stopped by?  And you gotta give love to get love!) in a timely manner.  But when it comes to a point wherein it takes longer to leave a comment (thanks to having to prove I'm no robot) than it does to actually read the post?  Well, it's almost not worth it.

But -- let's face it!  I can't completely abandon you.  I need to read your blogs and I need you to read mine!  I lubbers you!  So, here's what I'm gonna do to prove it.  I am leaving my word verification turned OFF  Yep!  That's right.  I'm hoping I will be able to stay under the radar of foreign bloggy solicitations, but I'm willing to take that risk just for you, dear readers.  And I guess I am hoping that maybe you love me just enough to do the same?

And I'm not joking...  it really does say:

Please prove you're not a robot

right before you have to decipher something like this...

Seriously...so annoying.  Okay, NOW 'nuff said!  Mwah!

Headlines: Two-Fer Dates, Exploding Clay, New Relationships and More!

FunnyMan ended up with 2 dates (sort of) for Homecoming this year. Pictures forthcoming.

I have been go-go-gadget-going to meet a deadline this weekend. Well, the deadline is officially today, but I was able to submit my writing over the weekend. Fingers crossed for an accepted submission, but if not, then I'll chalk it up to experience.

My ab muscle is on the mend. I've been doing 200 "soft" crunches just about every day to help new blood cells flow through that area, hopefully speeding up recovery. I am feeling much, much better. I even forget about the injury until I sneeze, roll over in the middle of the night, or attempt to engage in activity that directly uses that muscle.

Note to self: Next time you can't remember how much time to heat the "clay pouch" in the microwave for, google it. Exploding clay makes quite a mess.

Was supposed to be going out of town in a few weeks... thinking I might make a few minor adjustments to that plan.

Attending a 3-day conference towards the end of this week, and am really excited about that.

Was reminded yesterday that after struggles come the blessings. Hoping those come around the corner sooner or later. I've got some pending issues I would love answers to. :)

My fortune cookie recently told me to "Be prepared to welcome a new relationship soon." Okay... bring it. :)

5 Random Things

The Challenge: Post 5 random facts about you that most people do not already know.

This was hard for me because I am such an open book - especially here on the blog. And what I haven't shared here is, for the most part, stuff I consider too personal, even for me.

Here is what I came up with:

1) I have never driven a stick shift.

2) If presented the choice between chocolate and cheese, I choose cheese. Every time.

3) I still have all 4 of my Wisdom Teeth, and I can never have them removed either.

4) When I was a kid, I'd go "exploring". I used to catch frogs, worms, and all sorts of things. I found a few injured birds and had no qualms about picking them up. I remember once "finding" a bunch of baby mice. I held them in my hand too and carried them around all day long. I don't know when it happened, but things gross me out soooo easily now. I have a weak stomach and the mere thought of holding any type of rodents, reptiles, or birds with lice [probably] makes me want to throw up in my mouth.

5) I don't ALWAYS kiss on the first date. Just sayin'...

The Memoir

I have always loved writing, as far back as I can remember. I enjoyed writing poems in grade school, but I liked writing stories even more.

I didn't ever think of writing something with the potential of others every reading it, though. I just wrote for my own enjoyment. It wasn't until I was in a high school creative writing class did my teacher really encourage me. She continued to say time and time again that I had a "gift". Although I felt I struggled with writing at times, I think I am finally beginning to understand what she meant. Let me explain.

Fast forward to January, 2011. I sat down in an "Intro to Fiction Writing" class in college. On the first day the instructor asked us to go around the room and introduce ourselves by 1) Saying our name and 2) the genre we enjoy writing in.

Genre? Hmm. I had never really given any thought up until that moment about genre. Here I was writing a few short stories here and there and I never really thought about genre at all. I had about 2 minutes before it was my turn and I quickly thought about the things I had written up to that point as well as the type of fiction I had enjoyed reading. I decided that my "genre" was realism. Sometimes my pieces had a little hint of romance, sometimes a hint of mystery. I always like to have an element of humor or quirkiness, but yes, overall my "genre" would be Realism. So, that's what I said.

I should tell you that once I "discovered" my genre, it was actually easier to write. I didn't feel limited to only write realistic things. But I guess it helped me write with a particular audience in mind. That class was great as the instructor pushed us to write in genres we typically didn't. I feel I grew a lot as a writer in that class. It wasn't my first college writing class, but she was just a very eccentric instructor that helped me see things differently, and who took joy from edging me out of my comfort zone, or so it seemed.

Then over the summer, I took another creative writing class. In that class we discussed everything from poetry, to prose, to fabulist fiction, and even non-fiction. Non-Fiction? In Creative Writing? Well, that is what I thought the first time he mentioned it. In my mind, I kept picturing writing instruction manuals "Creatively", or writing a biography filled with hyperbole. I just couldn't wrap my head around the idea of creative non-fiction. Then I read David Sedaris. Then I LISTENED to David Sedaris read some of his own works. Hmmm... I thought. This is like blogging.

Then we had an assignment to WRITE a piece of creative non-fiction, otherwise known as Narrative Non-Fiction. I panicked. I wasn't sure what I should write about. I had a lot going on that week, and I felt fresh out of ideas. Then it hit me. I have been writing narrative non-fiction as long as I have had this blog! I skimmed through my blog and copied and pasted one of my favorite entries, tweaking a few things here and there. Honestly, I didn't think it was my best piece. But like I said, I was out of ideas.

However, when the instructor returned it to me, I had received 100%. His commentary was better than expected and he gave me great suggestions for improving it. At the end of the semester, he did a "conference" with each of us one-on-one. This, by far, was the best thing ever. Because he went through my portfolio and we discussed each of the assignment pieces I had written. He went back to the narrative nonfiction piece, a memoir and really encouraged me to choose that one for my final project. He then told me that I had a way of sharing my experiences that made others want to read them. He said I had some funny insights, and a clever way of putting things, but that the important part was that I wasn't afraid to lay it all out on the line. I am a REVEALOR, he said. I laughed and said, "you mean I share too much?" (Because I've heard that before!) He laughed and said, "The fact that you are so open about your experiences and your thoughts on those experiences is what makes it great. Most people don't share the things you are willing to share. That's why they like reading them."

So, the memoir it was. I worked and worked on it and then presented it to the class for my final piece. I got some good feedback, ways to make it better, etc. I was also met with some criticism as well. A few class members did not like how I worded a few things. They felt it was too personal. The instructor came to my defense and said "This is what sells. If she's smart, she will take it and turn it into a full-length manuscript and try to get it sold."

I should explain that during these review sessions, the class critiques your work and the writer is not allowed to speak. So, there I sat taking it all in. I couldn't explain or defend myself at all. And when he said that, I also had to refrain from jumping up and down. This was the biggest compliment of all.

This past week, I started the fall semester and I have a novel writing class. My instructor's new novel has just come out {more about that here} so he definitely has credibility. He told us in our first class that his goal for us is to get us well on our way with a solid novel. The first day he asked us to introduce ourselves and tell the class what we were working on. I could honestly say that I am working on a narrative nonfiction.

The more I work on this piece, the more excited I become. I don't know why I never realized that I prefer "narrative nonfiction" over "realism fiction". I mean, haven't I been doing that this whole time I've been blogging? Also, when I look back through my high school creative writing assignments (yes, I kept those), it was the creative NONfiction pieces that my teacher always seemed to love best. I even pulled out stuff from my freshman year of college (Circa 1992) and noticed that my best pieces were also non-fiction. (I wrote about my first kiss!)

So, that's what I am currently working on at the moment, the memoir. Hopefully, my family will not kill me over anything I "divulge". Then again, if it ever ends up selling, I'll just buy them off! haha!

Oh, and that "gift" my high school teacher once told me I had? Yeah -- well, I have finally come to understand that my "gift" is my willingness to "over share", haha.

One of My Heroes

I remember once when I was a kid my mom wrote me a note and said that I was a good example to her. I was shocked. I didn't think kids could possibly teach parents ANYTHING. Well, now that I am a parent, I know better. Today I am highlighting my fellow blogger and daughter, PrettyPrettyPrincess.

She blogged about some of her heroes. You should totally check her out {{HERE}}

She is one of MY heroes. :)

2 Books in Review

Don't worry -- you won't find any spoilers here. I just wanted to let you know of 2 books I finished over the weekend. Anyone who knows me, knows that Sparks is one of my indulgences. Of course, with school and work, I only get to read a new Sparks book about once a year! :)

If you're one of my FB friends, you already noticed I've gushed over "The Help". I've heard this book criticized for it's "tone" or "voice", accusing the writer of stereotyping the characters. Well, suffice it to say -- "PHBBBT! I loved it!"

Here are my official "GoodReads" reviews! :)

The Rescue by Nicholas Sparks

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Sparks has done it again. I could totally picture the characters coming to life as I read this book. I will admit, I usually hate reading "prologues" but this one was riveting enough to keep my attention. Unlike many of his other stories, this one starts off with twists of excitement. I kept wondering, "If he shows all of his cards now, where else can the characters go and will the climax make enough of an impact? Or is this a case of a story peaking too soon?" Trust me -- it can go places and the climax is great. Even though I had figured out a little bit of the pivotal moment beforehand, there was still the element of surprise and I didn't think the story felt predictable at all. It was great! Loved it!

The Help by Kathryn Stockett

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


I completely loved this book. I didn't want it to end, and I wanted to know what happened to the characters years later. This book definitely deals with some raw emotions and it's hard to imagine these were the attitudes only a decade before I was born. The character development in each of the main characters was well executed and I was impressed that Stockett chose a 1st person narrative and chose to tell the story from the point of view of 3 different characters. This is very difficult for a writer to [successfully] pull off. She not only does it, but she does it well. I think writing in the first person helps to pull the reader in. Each section reads almost like a memoir. Despite it's length I found it to be a quick read. I read half of it in about 4 hours and couldn't wait for this past holiday weekend so I could finish it, which I did. The characters have become real to me now, and I feel vested in them and their plight. I am amazed that this is Stockett's first novel and I cannot wait for the movie to come out in August!



View all my reviews

This Feeling

Do you ever get that lump in your throat? You know... the one in which you try to hold back because you know it's brought on by the urge to cry? Yeah, that one. I don't even know why, suffice it to say I've just been feeling extremely overwhelmed for quite some time now; like it's been slowly brewing, and yet it's not even one thing really. At least not that I can pin point at the moment. I've had that for several weeks now.

I was glad when summer started. It meant my class load would not be as heavy. My friend let me come for a visit to Oregon, and when someone gives you an invite like that, the kind wherein you don't have to pay for everything, you don't turn it down. I thought this would make things better; and it did, for a while. It was better while I was there. I had fun and I relaxed. And then I came home, and that feeling crept back in.

I decided to take my kids camping for the 4th of July. The cost for the campsite for the entire weekend was way less than 1 night at a decent hotel. And there was a beach. I thought, why not? I took my youngest and her friend. My oldest and his friend came up the next night and stayed over one night. But my oldest has summer school and left the afternoon of the 4th. While there, everything seemed ok. Of course, it's a lot of work setting up camp by myself, but I did it, and I was proud of myself. And after the hard work, I relaxed. I read my books. I felt good.

Then this morning, I was packing up to come home; trying to beat the rain that I knew was coming. The [little] girls were not so thrilled to be helping first thing in the morning, although my daughter knows me well enough to know when not to argue. Just as we finished loading the car and drove away, the rain started. And that feeling... it came back.

The whole way home I felt antsy. When we finally got home an hour later and started unloading the car, we walked through the door to a smell that churned our stomachs. I swear, it smelled like a rotting corpse. Not to say I have ever been around a rotting corpse. Nonetheless, I was for certain something died in my house. It didn't take but a few seconds to discover the refrigerator is completely dead and all of the meat in the freezer and fresh produce & dairy in the fridge went bad the entire time we were gone. I about lost my breakfast.

All of that food...gone. The cost of a replacement refrigerator? More than I have, for sure. I don't even want to think about it right now. I have homework I need to finish before class tonight. So, I pull up my laptop and decide a quick vent on Facebook just might help me get out some of this frustration over the fridge. And then it happened. That lump in my throat that I have been shoving back for the past 5 or 6 weeks or so, finally gave in and I began to hyperventilate. The tears have started and now can't seem to stop.

I know something will work out, for something always does. I just cant wrap my brain around how and when. I know that in the end everything will be fine. And I know that there are others out there with way harder lives than I've got.

But for the moment, for the time being, I'd like to run away, anywhere and live a different life, even if only for a bit. I am tired of feeling overwhelmed. It occurs to me that this is the reason I have enjoyed getting away, being in different places, reading books, etc. I've enjoyed the escape because it is my way of pretending everything else I have to deal with (life) does not exist.

I know I have much to be grateful for. I know I shouldn't complain. No one enjoys reading someone else's whiny pity-party. And I sure I will feel foolish tomorrow for writing this today. But for now, for whatever reason, I just need to wallow a bit, before faking my way through my homework. Besides, it's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Haha.

Thanks for listening... don't feel you must comment. I really don't like people to feel sorry for me. I feel plenty sorry for myself to go around, lol!

Now to breathe...in...out...in...out... this too shall pass.

Bloggy love to you all! :)

Blog Stalking

Blog Stalking: To read and/or follow someone's blog without leaving a comment or making it known you're following.

If you're here, chances are, you've done it. You've stalked a blog or two in your day. No worries, I've stalked a few blogs myself. Ain't no shame. And lemme be the first to say, that if you've ever stalked my blog, why thanks. I simply love attention knowing that perhaps something I have written has been beneficial or at the very least, mildly entertaining for someone.

I know a lot of people blog to keep family members informed of the "goings on" in their lives. Not me. I mean, it's great that my family can read this and know what's happening in my world. However, this blog is not the "Emma's Family Blog" nor a digital scrapbook of sorts. It's just whatever I feel like writing.

I originally started blogging after I was divorced. Blogging gave me an avenue by which to channel my anxiety, even if I didn't necessarily blog about the divorce. I was entering a new chapter of my life and while realizing that I am writing my story now, it was only natural for me to blog. Additionally, I am an insomniac. I would sleep a few hours at a time each night and anything more than 4 hours total was "good". So -- I had lots of time to blog.

That being said, I had tons of time to read blogs too. And read them I did. I would read blogs for inspiration, for entertainment and for validation -- to know that I wasn't the only one kinda like me out there. I met some of whom I now consider my closest friends via blogging. A few I would even go as far to say we're "kindreds". For realsies.

I probably followed close to 150 blogs on a daily basis. And I quickly gained a following of approximately that many in return. But then - something happened. Yep, the F word happened. Facebook.

With the rise of Facebook, many bloggers abandoned their posts on the blogosphere and as a result they also stopped following. And not only did they stop blogging and stop following, but they stopped following ME! I know, right? Who would ever want to forsake this li'l gem I've created here?

Then I started back at school and as my schedule changed, my family needs changed and so did my world of blogging. I have not been able to post as often as I'd like, nor have I been able to follow as many blogs as I'd like.

I've finally went through my blogroll and deleted the blogs that haven't posted in over a year (unless they are super-duper friends) as well as the blogs that no longer serve a purpose for me anymore. So, if I have stopped following, please do not take it personally or think that I have not enjoyed reading your blog. It's just that my needs have changed and my reasons for blogging are a bit different now. And of course, by slimming down the blogs I follow, I will have more time to leave bloggy comment love on the ones I do read.

I am not naive enough to believe that everyone who started off following me still does and I realize I may lose followers over this. I mean, this isn't my first rodeo. I know how it works: You gotta give love to get love. I have a bloggy friend I met a few years ago and we both started blogging about the same time. She has over 1,100 daily followers and she probably spends every hour of every waking day reading and commenting on blogs, for the pure purpose that those bloggers will read and comment on her blog in return. What a comment whore! haha. Just kidding! But she did tell me recently, "If you had been following more blogs, then you'd have more followers by now." I was all, "No. En. No." I don't have time to read even HALF that many! Sheesh!

That being said, thank you to those who are still reading and following. I totally heart attention the friendships I've made! Even though I am also a Facebook addict user, I will always blog so long as their is a forum by which to do so. I am a writer. It's what I do.

Nuff said.

Hacking, Finals & Prom

I know these each probably deserve their own posts, but too tired. Haha.

Okay, first off -- Hacking and Computer Viruses. I think we've all dealt with this in some form or another. It's easy to detect if we get an email from someone we don't know and the subject line says something like "Viagra for $.99!" Delete, right? (Well, all except Robb Logger, I bet! haha).

Anyway -- but what about when the message in your inbox is seemingly from someone you know? And it usually DOESN'T have a subject line? Happens all of the time. So, in many cases you open it before realizing what it is. Usually these viruses are activated just by simply opening the email. And then it automatically copies your contacts list and generates the same email to all of your contacts.

The last way that email viruses seem to happen is that the email is from someone you may or may not know and DOES have a subject line; something obscure like, "Check out this pic I found of you!" And then you open it and there is a link for you to click on. As soon as you click that link, ~BAM~ virus.

So -- here are some things to remember:

1) If you see an email from someone you do not know, DELETE IT. DO NOT OPEN.

2) If you receive an email with nothing in the subject line, DELETE IT. DO NOT OPEN.

3) If there is an "odd" message with a link, DELETE IT. DO NOT OPEN.

AND FINALLY -- and here is one of the most important parts:

4) Change your email password ASAP.

And then send an email to your contacts with the subject line something like, "It looks like my email account was hacked" so that they know not to open the previous one, in case they haven't yet.

I know I am bad about this, but I have been trying to make sure that from now on when I send out an email I ALWAYS put a subject in the subject line. I am asking you to do the same. Chances are, if you send me an email with nothing in the subject line, I will just delete it without opening. So, if I don't show up to your birthday party, you'll know why. Haha.

~oh~ This is also true for Facebook and Facebook Private Messages and Wall Posts. Don't open things without subject lines. Don't click on odd links. And if you've been hacked, changed your FB password (and the password to the email address associated with it) as soon as possible.

~moving on~

Finals this week~ w00t! I have one MAJOR portfolio due today. A HUGE report due. A LONG theory exam tonight. And a SCARY recital on Friday! And THEN my dear readers I will be able to catch up on reading your blogs and commenting and posting new stuff on mine. Can't wait!

And lastly... My son went to Senior Prom a few weeks ago. They went to Buca di Beppo for dinner which they said was AWESOME! If you've never been to Buca it's a fun place (at least in my opinion) and the food is authentic. I don't know if they do this at all of the locations, but they do at this one... when your table is ready, the host takes your party through a quick kitchen tour so you can see where all of the magic happens. It's a bustling place and the chefs are a lot of fun. But there is also 1 big booth IN the kitchen; front and center. So, if you're lucky enough to get a reservation for that table, it's like having your own personal cooking show. Not only that, but all of the other groups who come through get to see you and be all jealous, Haha. The waiter takes extra special care of the kitchen table and the chefs show off each dish once it's prepared, including the desserts so you can ooh and ahh over it. Well, FunnyMan called and got THAT table. They had a blast. And now for your viewing pleasure, Prom Pictures!

Lots Going On...

Where do I even begin?

Well, first let me say this: I will never, ever, EVER, EVER take 5 classes again during a semester while I am also working 40 hours a week. Ever. My life has been way too crazy this semester. Even last semester when I had 4 classes, it was too crazy. I vow to only take 3 or less from now on, even if that means my kids all finish college before I do. Ha. But seriously. I am making myself sick and it isn't worth the stress.

Moving on...

There was some car trading going on between siblings and my parents, etc., and I was able to "trade in" my van for a newer vehicle with much better gas mileage. It's an '09 Altima, which I already love. I had an Altima before and hands down, it was the best car I ever had. So, I am looking forward to driving this. Which brings me to the next item.

I wanted the better gas mileage because my daily routine has been changing quite a bit lately. I used to live, work and drive kids to school all within a 5 mile radius of each other. It was nice. Having a mid-sized van with a super-sized gas tank was never much of an issue because I rarely ever went anywhere. Even when I started driving to school twice a week, it wasn't that bad -- 11 miles each way. But this semester (with my crazy schedule) I've been driving to campus 5 times a week. Additionally, there is a huge construction project downtown ("Citycreek") and I have been asked to help the team that has that account. So, I've been busy-busy-busy and driving all over Salt Lake for that the past few weeks. It's been a lot of fun, though. I've been able to meet a lot of new people and I am part of something great, which makes me feel, well, GREAT! But -- the gas was killing me -- and my budget. So, again, the newer car will be fantabulous!

Only 3 1/2 more weeks until the semester is over. I still have a total of 3 more exams, 1 group project and 4 stories to crank out until then. And THEN a little, teensy, weensy break before summer term starts.

Speaking of summer -- can I just tell you how EXCITED I am for it!?!?!? I have lots of fun things planned with trips and reunions!

But in the meantime, if I talk and don't make any sense, or cry over "nothing" at the drop of a hat, just know that it's not you; it's me. Haha. At least for a few more weeks. I can do this, right?

Well, even if I can't, I am going to. And I'll do my best and laugh at myself along the way if needed!

I am Emma, hear me "roar"... tee hee.

Funny HaHa

found on http://pyza.blip.pl/archive/1/2009

An Apology, Excuse, and Explanation

First off I want to apologize for not being very visible around the blogosphere as of late. But -- I can explain. Really, I can.

First off, I made it through finals back in December. I thought I would have a lot of time to blog and relax during the holiday break. Wrong. Because then I had to get my tree up and get my house ready for family to come and finish all of the last minute shopping and so on and so forth. I kept thinking that after Christmas I would have a little time before school started back up again. But, dear readers I got sick. I had a bad sinus infection and just felt like crap pretty much that entire week.

Then it was back to school. I am now officially done with all of my generals and 100% of my courses are devoted to my majors: Music and English. And don't be one of those people -- the ones that roll their eyes when I say "music". I don't know why people think music is easy. It's not. But that's an entirely a different post, of which I will indulge you at some point in the near future.

Anyway -- this semester I am taking four classes. I have "Intro to Writing Fiction", "Music Theory II", "Musicianship/Sight Singing & Ear-training", and "Private Piano Instruction". Mon-Thurs I leave straight from work around 5pm and head to campus for classes that start at 5:30pm. I am done by 8pm each night. And then I head home for about 2-3 hours of homework a night. On Fridays I take a long lunch hour for one class I have and then at some point throughout the weekend I try to catch up or tackle any homework or major writing assignments that I haven't gotten to.

On top of that, I have family stuff and church obligations as well. Man, no wonder I am tired! So, dear readers, don't take it personally if I haven't stopped by lately. I promise, I will be back to catch up.

First, I have to figure out when to take down the Christmas tree. Yes...it's still up. Yes, I know... don't say it.

Recently I happened to mention to someone that I needed to work on some blog posts. Her reply was a simple "Why don't you just stop blogging? Wouldn't that be easier?" ~GASP!~ Surely, she jests, right?

Some people blog to keep family members across the miles informed of their goings on. Others blog for self-therapy. Some use it as a journal, while others view it as purely entertaining. I agree. I do find the benefits of all of the aforementioned reasons. But mainly, I blog because I am a writer.

I read an article about a year ago that talked about the labels we give ourselves. Do we call ourselves a musician or someone who plays an instrument? Do we consider ourselves a crafter or do we say we just like crafts? The article went on to say that the way we label ourselves often times has a direct correlation to how successful we are in that particular area. I decided right then and there I was going to stop saying "someday I hope to be a writer" and instead say, "I am a writer."

It doesn't matter that I haven't actually been paid for anything yet. It doesn't matter that I haven't been selected by a publishing house (I want to avoid self-publishing if possible). What matters is that I write. Just like any skill that requires hours of practice to become good, the same is true with writing. If you ask a virtuoso how many hours a day she spends practicing her violin, she will say somewhere between 4 and 10 hours a day.

So, you see, this isn't "just blogging". It's how I "practice". It's how I hone my skill. And reading blogs helps me to gain perspective, learn techniques and pick up on some other creative ideas.

While I may have had to cut back on the amount of posts I have ready to publish or the amount of blogs I can visit on any given day, I can't see myself forsaking the writing any time in the near future.

That being said - I am off to my writing class! My one true hope is that when I walk in, my instructor will have chosen to wear a bra. I am sort of getting tired of seeing her girls grazing the top of her belt. Not a pretty look.

Till next time my faithful readers.

XOXO
Emma

Inquiring Minds Wanna Know

I have three children. All of them are intelligent and creative and think things I never woulda thunk when I was their age. Or if I did think those things, I usually just kept my inquisitions to myself. But not my daughter. Nope. She is an asker.

As a toddler...

Her: Why is the sky blue, Mommy?

Me: Because it just is.

Her: But WHY, Mommy?

Me: Because God made it that way.

Her: Why did God make it that way, Mommy?

Me: Uh... I don't know. Ask God.

As a kindergartener...

Her: How did popcorn get invented?

Me: I don't know. I suppose that someone dropped some kernals into hot oil on accident.

Her: But what made them think to taste it to see if it was good?

Me: Um... ask God?

As a 2nd grader...

Her: So, I've heard that tomatoes are fruits, is that true?

Me: Yup.

Her: What's the difference between fruits and vegetables then?

Me: Um... fruits are of the vine?

Her: Apples don't grow on vines. And would that mean a pumpkin is a fruit?

Me: Oh, well, then I think that fruit have flowers first.

Her: Bananas don't start off as flowers.

Me: Google it?

Fast forward.

The types of questions my 5th grader has asked as of late:

Is a pineapple a citrus fruit? What about a coconut? Is that even a fruit at all or is it a nut? And while we're on the subject, Avocados have a really huge pit -- perhaps that is really a nut of sorts. And why exactly were the Montagues and Capulets at odds with each other? I mean, why all the brawling in the streets? And if the Latin meaning of the word Amat means "love", and the root of the word Amateur is the Latin word "amat", then shouldn't the word Amateur have something to do with love? Why do phobias all have weird names? And why are they all Greek words? You're what, twenty-something years older than me? That means you'll be eighty-something years old when Halley's comet comes around again? And is it pronounced Hal-lee's or Hay-lee's? I've heard people say it both ways. What's the weather going to be like tomorrow?

My answers?

I don't know, Google it. Not sure, did you Google it? That's a good question, you should Google it. Um... oh look, Greg on Facebook says... Check Wikipedia for that one. I don't know, they just do. Yes. I suppose. I don't really know... I guess you could Google it. Check weather.com.

When I say Inquiring Minds Wanna Know, I wasn't kidding. She has questions for just about anything, at any time, any where. The wheels in her head are always turning. Always.

But, I must say, she comes by it honestly. Her Granddad is like that. He wonders and thinks and finally tinkers with the things that he thunk, which makes him a tink. hehe.

Since she was in Kindergarten she's wanted to be a pediatric nurse. But she is always curious about space and the stars and planets and about weather and the environment and animals, etc. I think this girl is a Scientist. I can easily see her become a research nurse, if there were ever such a thing. When she has a question about something, she doesn't let go until she finds the answer or solution. I think this is why she'd make a great researcher or scientist or doctor or even nurse.

To all of those questions she's asked over the years, she will often research and find out the truth for herself. And then of course she will share her new found knowledge with me. Haha.

Am I smarter than a Fifth-Grader? Not always! :)

Happy Birthday to ME!

Happy Birthday to Me.

Happy Birthday to Me.

Happy Birthday to Me...

Happy Birthday to Me!

Okay, fine. It's not really my birthday.

But I was cleaning off my FB wall, and I got as far back as my birthday and rereading all of those wishes made me feel a little bit better. So, [sings at top of lungs]...Happy Birthday to ME! Just think of it as a re-run. :)

On another note, thinking of birthday makes me think of cake which reminded me of this cute "Love Birds" engagement cake I saw... Check it out. Adorable or what?

Winter BLAHs

I am not a fan of winter. I am not a fan of snow. I am not a fan of dark and gloomy days. I am not a fan of cold. It's bad here too because when the inversion hits, everything is foggy and smoggy, and you can't even hardly see the mountains.

In the winter is when I feel depression tugging a little harder and hanging on a little longer than at other times. It often starts before Thanksgiving and I start to get this feeling that I want to crawl into bed, cover up and not come out until Spring. One lady accused me of having no Christmas Spirit. It's not that. I love the holidays -- the true meaning of the holidays, anyway. I love spending time with family when they come. But it's just the gloomy feeling of... I dunno... everything.

I made it through Christmas and the kids and I enjoyed it. I forced myself to get the tree up and decorated. One of these days, I will force myself to take it down. But in my defense, today - January 6th - is the day of the Epiphany. So, technically, in old Christian traditions your tree is supposed to stay up through today anyway. Regardless, I am going to try really hard to take it down before March... which is what happened a few years ago, haha.

I am a believer that I am in charge of my own attitude. I can get up and choose whether to be happy or not be happy. I am the one who chooses my reaction or pro-activeness to the events that will take place today. And, for the most part, I'd say I am pretty good about staying upbeat and positive. But that doesn't mean I still don't have this... feeling.

I can't really put it into complete words. And I know that men especially have a hard time understanding. Whenever I try to talk it out with a guy he doesn't really "get" it and usually tries to give me advice to FIX it. (Why can't men just listen and then comfort without trying to FIX it?) But like yesterday for example, it was a great day. I had fundings and closings and new orders at work. I went to lunch with a great group of people. I ate the best salad and made the best cinnamon rolls. I checked online and saw that all of my financial aid paperwork was finalized for the semester. I had a relaxing evening. And yet, there was this lump in my throat all day. The lump that forms when you are on the verge of tears. That lump. I have that on most days when I feel like this. And yet it isn't like there is any one thing that is making me want to cry. And usually, I avoid people when I get like this, to minimize any trigger for tears.

I don't like people to feel sorry for me -- so please do not leave the "I'm sorry you're feeling that way" comment. I just blog about it, because perhaps it helps me make more sense of it in some way. I don't take medication for it because I don't feel it is severe enough and I am not a good pill swallower. Having to swallow pills makes me have anxiety, haha. But I do what my counselor has referred to as "talk therapy" and I find it helps. I guess that is more of what this is, "talk therapy" by way of "blog therapy". I know I must be rambling... and this may or may not make sense.

Anyway -- back in "the day" when I was married had a good job and 2+ incomes, I often shopped. People joke about "retail therapy", but it's a real thing. When I'd feel down, finding something on sale was a quick pick-me-up. Often times, the purchased items weren't even for me. Nonetheless, I felt better. Well, that's not an option anymore. So, I am back to the "talk therapy". I don't like talking too much about it, because again, I don't want the pity. Also, I don't like being a Negative Nelly and feel like I'm whining or something. I tend to keep it in if it isn't funny or positive or upbeat.

I am hoping that once school starts up on Monday I will be too busy to be fully aware of this gloomy feeling hanging around my head and my heart.

Anyway -- so that is why I haven't been "around" the blogosphere lately. Just don't really feel like doing much of anything... just feel like staying in bed, all day with my jammies on.

It's a good thing I need the money, or I'd probably be ditching work. haha.

Anyway, that's it. The end.

Talk About It Tuesday

What's bugging you lately? Let's talk about it! After all, it's "Talk About it Tuesday!"

Things that bug me:

Because my FB status is "single" I get all sorts of singles ads on my FB side bar. One says, "Would you like to meet attractive men?" I mean, really? What kind of question is that? Ummm... no. I think I'll try one of the ugly ones... I'm sort of tired of the hot, sexy, attractive ones.

When I don't need to be anywhere early and yet that is the one morning I find myself wide awake at 6am! Grrrrr....

Wet towels on the bathroom floor.

When I forget to turn my phone on silent and my friend calls me while I am at church and everyone turns to look at me just as I remember my phone is tucked securely into my bra strap. Yeah... that bugs.

When people write sentences and don't bother using correct punctuation or any punctuation for that matter it's hard to know whether they are making a statement or asking a question the only statement I believe them to be making is that they are too lazy or too ignorant to know how to punctuate a paragraph correctly wouldn't you say if not at least they should remember from third grade the appropriate places for periods.

So, there you go -- that's what's bugging me lately. How about you? C'mon, don't be shy ~ It's Talk About it Tuesday! :)

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

So, I had several posts in the hopper. Ready to go. Scheduled to post. But then something happened.

I got emotional.

Y'know how when you get upset over something you totally go all neat-freak and clean? Yeah... me neither. But I've heard of people like that.

Well, let's just say I kinda sorta finally understand that sort of need for that sort of adrenaline rush. It happened to me, sort of. I cleaned...

I cleaned up my Facebook wall and I cleaned up all scheduled posts on the blog. And by cleaned, what I really mean is purged. Yup. I totally deleted everything I had in the hopper. I was like one of those celebrity hosts on one of those hoarder TV shows, where they go in and just start tossing. That is pretty much what I did; without even reading through them again.

Why? How the Helen Keller should I know. I just did it. Did it feel good? Yes. Sickeningly enough, it actually did. When it was all said and done, and when my somewhat slightly psychotic episode was over, I actually felt empowered. As if I had just achieved something. And not just any old something. Something important. All right, well not something important. But I felt accomplished nonetheless.

Am I ok, you ask? Oh sure. I'm fine. Keep on moving folks, nothing to see here...show's over! But for realsies. I am okay. Thanks for asking.

The bigger question now is... what to write. I mean, with nothing in the hopper I am gonna be writing cold turkey. Impromptu. On the Fly. Flyin' by the seat of my pants.

Please keep all arms and feet inside until the ride has come to a complete stop...

Monday with Mary Margaret

So recently I won a goody package over at {{Kaye Kaye's Blog}} and scored all of this:

How cool is that?!?!?! (by the way, check out the upper left corner of the magazine... Yes. Yes she totally DID accidentally mail me her key FOB! hahaha!)

BUT... here is the thing I cherish the most from the package:

Yep... it's a letter from Butler Manor's very own teenager Mary Margaret. To her I am the crazy, funny lady that blogs. This child, knowing that I have been through heartache a time or two, sent me a list of her "Rules for Dating". Seriously, this chica could have her own talk show; totally cracks me up.

Please fasten your seatbelts and keep all hands and legs inside until this ride has come to a complete stop. Here we go....!

Mary Margaret's Rules for Dating:

1) He has to be a good person...doesn't matter if he is fat or ugly, tall or short. It only matters for who he is.

2) NEVER let a guy say you need to lose weight. And if he doesn't like you for who you are, he is no good.

3) Never EVER let him say perverted things to you or your parents or about them. It's just so wrong; he is no good.

4) The best kind of birth control is to put an aspirin between your knees and hold it.

5) If you find out he's cheating, he is no good.

6) Guys should ALWAYS pay so you won't be broke.

7) Make SURE you got a guy that brushes his teeth.

8) Slow dancing is a plus :)

9) CUTE! (wait... what happened to #1? tee hee)

10) Funny -- he must be worth hanging out with! =D

Love you!
Mary Margaret


Quite frankly, I think she's got this nailed down, don't ya think? Kaye Kaye, you've done a great job with her! Thanks again for the goodies!!! :)

Monday Musings

School...

My summer semester is done. I have about 2 1/2 weeks off until Fall starts.

I wish the grades would hurry and post... Anxious to see what I got. My Bio Prof posted her overall grades, and I got an A!!! YAY!!!

However, my Meteorology Prof *still* hasn't graded the last 2 assignments. I have done all of the math up to the last 2 assignments, and depending on what grades I get on those two, I should finish with either a high B or a low A. I am keeping my fingers crossed for the A. Don't know why it's important to me, but it is.

Oh, and by the way, I don't feel like I retained very much information in either class. Recently, someone asked me about the cloud type overhead, because she knew I was taking a meteorology class. My response? "Ummm... Billowy....and White?" yeah. I don't really know much about the weather; it didn't stick. It was more along the lines of the "Learn. Regurgitate. Flush." method for both of my Science classes this semester. Face it... just not good at Science :)

Although, here is something I *DID* learn. As kids, whenever there was a lightning storm, we'd start counting as soon as we saw the flash. "One one-thousand, Two one-thousand..." or "One Mississippi, Two Mississippi..." until we heard thunder. We always thought that for every second we counted, that is how far away the lightning strike was. WRONG. It is actually more like 5 seconds per mile (3 per km). If you see lightning and hear thunder simultaneously, it is less than 1 mile away. However, if you see lightning and do not hear thunder, it is more than 12 miles away.

That's it. That's all I got as far as weather. I mean, that's pretty important stuff right there, isn't it?

Other stuff, other stuff....

Movies

I got to see TWO movies this weekend, and that was a real treat for me. Seems like with school and lack of fundage, I rarely get to watch the movies on the big screen. But I finally saw Inception. Way good. Way intense. The story line was a little complex and the cinematography was brilliant. The acting was waaaaay awesome. I loved this film, and would put it right up there near my all-time favorite Bourne movies.

I also saw The Other Guys. If you really want a no-brainer movie that makes you laugh, this is a good one. It's "pee-your-pants" funny. However, if you hate other Will Ferrel movies, this may not be for you. The only downer about it was that it wasn't as funny as I anticipated. More "stupid" funny than funny-funny.

Next, I wanna see Salt and Eat.Pray.Love.

Food

A few months back I met up with an old college friend down in Happy Valley. We watched Night & Day (totally good) and ate gelato at this FABULOUS place. I had the Pistachio gelato. I think it's my fav! I was craving that the other day, and lucky me, Smith's Marketplace near my house now has a gelato bar. Even better than that... they have PISTACHIO!!! w00t! Not quite as good as the fancy-schmancy-pay-double-price gelato place... nevertheless, still quite tasty!

Yumm-o! I'm a sushi lover, but a bit of a sushi snob too. There are only certain sushi rolls I love, and I am partial to the seared fish vs. the raw stuff. Also, if it has cream cheese in it and fried in Tempura... HEAVEN!!! Went to The Happy Sumo with Friends. Got my fav Las Vegas Roll and Potstickers. Nom, nom, nom!

Ugh-ness...

Due to job circumstances with the other parental unit of my chillens, I will not be receiving any more child support until further notice. Yeah, this sort of sucks. I was stressed for about the first 24 hours. But, now oddly enough I feel just fine. Don't really know why. Maybe it hasn't fully hit me yet? Ever since I became a single mom, we've sort of lived by the saying, "Use it up, wear it out, make due, or do without." So... that's what we'll continue to do. Oh, and just so you don't think that I am foolishly blowing money on movies and food and whatnot... a little guardian angel of mine slipped some cash in an envelope with a note that said, "This is FUN money. You are to only use this money to PAMPER yourself. The rest will figure itself out." At first, I was like, "How can I PAMPER myself when I am worried about $$$ ???" But then I decided, maybe I *DO* need to have some fun and relaxation to get through this week. So, fun won out :)

Weddings

A neighbor's son got married and I was able to go to the reception. Chocolate Brown and Tiffany Box Blue were their colors. They were soooo stinkin cute. And the decor was simple and elegant. I've known about the reception for quite a few weeks, and I don't like to skimp on the gifts. But, with my budget, I have to be resourceful. Well, a few weekends ago, some of my gal pals "dragged" me to Ikea.... I found a cutting board, a set of steak knives, and a cooking knife set all for under $10. Then I was at the book store and found a really cool cook book for $3. Voila! I had a great gift!

Friends

So, in my week of Finals and "fun", I've been spending time hanging with some of my besties too! Desperate Housewife & I got to go hang out for a bit, as did Ames & I. Oh, and then there's my online dude friend. I think he's had me in tears and stiches from laughing so hard this past week more than I have laughed in a long time. It's been a while, so it's been great "hanging out" with him. And even tho I said I'd never do online gaming, he did get me to join Superhero City. It's been a lot of fun skyping and fighting crime together.... "don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter." (Napoleon Dynamite)

Me, Myself, and I...

I went and got a massage on Saturday! I have been uber-stressed with finals and I decided that would be my reward! It was pure Heaven! A few years ago, I used to go every week. I had the last appointment each Friday. It was also the only time in my adult life I never had back problems. Anyway. that went away when I became a single mom. However, I did promise myself after Saturday that I would not wait another 2 1/2 years to go back.

I also bought myself some CANDY!!! Which I haven't done in FOREVER! Thanks to the good ol' diet. But I just didn't see how I could possibly make it through finals without it :)

So... there you have it. That is what is new in MY neck of the woods!

Collections: Saying Sorry

I was working on a PowerPoint Presentation for school last semester and needed an image that represented "sorry". I found some that were funny and others that were just too cute. Here is my "sorry" collection.

And if you ever need a good "Excuse"... try one of these on for size... Or perhaps make several copies and keep them close at hand! LOL!