Senior Texting Codes

Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting, there appears to be a need for a STC (Senior Texting Code).
If you qualify for Senior Discounts this is the code for you.

ATD: At The Doctor's

BFF: Best Friend Farted

BTW: Bring The Wheelchair

BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth

CBM: Covered By Medicare

CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center

DWI: Driving While Incontinent

FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers

FWIW: Forgot Where I Was

FYI: Found Your Insulin

GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low!

GHA: Got Heartburn Again

HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement

IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?

LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out

LOL: Living On Lipitor

LWO: Lawrence Welk's On

OMMR: On My Massage Recliner

OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas.

ROFL...CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing... And Can't Get Up

SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop

TTYL: Talk To You Louder

WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?

WTFA: Wet The Furniture Again

WTP: Where's The Prunes?

WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil

Feel free to add any codes you feel are missing; send the additions back to the person who sent you this so they can update their list.

Safe Text

FunnyMan (who claims he was the last of his kind) finally got a cell phone for his 15th birthday this month. He has unlimited text, which of course is a must-have for any normal, cool, and overly social teenager. Even though he loves, LOVES, LOVES texting his friends, he has also discovered the beauty of texting ME - his dear old mother - when he is downstairs and I am upstairs.

It's such a "time saver" and yelling from one end of the house to the other no longer becomes a means of communication. So, texting, you see actually provides for a much more "civil" environment, hahaha!

Anyway, so here I am, sitting in my bed with my laptop (ahh... love how technology aids to my lazy moments) and I get the following text from FunnyMan:

FM: PrettyPrettyPrincess wants to know what SPERM is...

I, of course laughed. And knowing just how prudish my 9 year old daughter can be (she doesn't even like to HEAR the word "kiss"), I sent the following response:

ME: Tell her it's the man's portion that makes a baby and she probably won't ask anymore.

Not less than two seconds later, I receive his report.

FM: LOL! You Called It!

Great... now if ALL of my birds and bees discussions could be taught via Text... hmmm.... Perhaps I could write a sex-ed seminar and teach it via Text...

Of course I'd encourage all class members to only practice safe text...[snickering]...tee hee...