I know I have shared some strange dreams in the past. This one nears the top especially because the dream felt so realistic in spite of it's unrealistic nature.
________
I am traveling by train. It is night time and dark outside. I get off the train and it's raining. I am wearing sort of this gypsy skirt. I walk through the streets of an outdoor mall that never seems to end. Finally, I make it to a campus. I am looking for something, though I am not sure what. I enter a dorm. The halls are dimly lit. I walk up a few flight of stairs. An old woman greets me and says I look tired and hungry. I nod. Am I some sort of vagabond, I wonder. She seats me at a table and fixes me a plate of leftovers. She then brings out a few history books about the college. I thumb through the books, knowing that a clue to whatever I am looking for must be in there somewhere. Her adult son joins us. There isn't any conversation. But I eat and eat and can't seem to get enough. The old woman brings more food to the table and remarks that I must be starving. I think about that, and rub my tummy.
I think about the unborn baby I am carrying. Has anyone noticed? I don't appear to be showing and yet I am about five months along. I leave the dorm and travel back through the mall. I am tired. I think about the fact that I only have $25 in my pocket and I will need to provide clothes for my unborn child. I worry about what people will think when they find out I am pregnant. I wonder if they will believe me when I tell them that I have not had sex with anyone. How will I explain that I am pregnant when I don't even know myself how it happened?
Soon, I happen upon an old historic apartment building. I look up. The light is on in the apartment upstairs. I enter and make my way up the stairs. I knock at the door and Big-D answers. We sit on the couch and I pour my heart out, telling him all of the stress I have been going through. I tell him about the baby. He said he knows and has known all along. I stress about it. He tells me to relax and that everything will work out. I offer him some Smarties. He says he has never heard of them and asks what they are. I tell him they are candy. I pull a roll out of my pocket. I eat a few, but feed him the ones I do not like. He makes a sour-face. I laugh and tell him that they are the orange ones. He then gets a call from his friend asking if he sold his place yet. Big-D says that yes he sold his place, but doesn't let on that he sold it to me. It seemed as if it was all supposed to be kept confidential, which for some reason I am grateful. After talking to him I feel less stressed. I feel like I can breathe again.
It is day time now and the rain has let up. I talk to my mom and she mentions that she has a whole bunch of gift cards for Kohl's that people have given her. She tells me that there is no way she is ever going to use them all. She asks if I want them. I get excited, since Kohl's is my favorite store. I tell her I would love them as long as she goes shopping with me. I tell her I need to buy baby clothes for my unborn baby, which is most likely a girl. She says that she already knows; that a mother always knows. I was relieved. She brought my sister from back home out to come shopping with us too. No one seemed mad or upset or disappointed that I was pregnant. And even weirder, no one seemed to challenge me on my statement that I had not had sex since prior to my divorce, well over a year earlier. They just all seemed accepting of me and my situation.
The dream comes to an end as we start discussing possible baby names... McKinnley, Kade, Kale, Sawyer, Collier, ... and that's all I remember.
Showing posts with label secrets. Show all posts
Showing posts with label secrets. Show all posts
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Sunday, August 24, 2008
My Dirty Little Secrets...
All right, these aren't actually Dirty, and they're not really secrets either.
A while ago my friend, Emily did a post called "100 Things About Me" and her sister Ann did one called "Have You Ever..." Both of these posts made me think of my own idiosyncrasies that no one knows about. I know what you're thinking: "Perhaps those things should remain unknown."
Too bad...I'm posting these anyway, and you will just have to deal with it. What's that my dad used to say? "You will read it, and you will like it"? Oh, wait...I think it was "eat" not "read". Well, never mind then. Just read, and if you don't like what you see...change the channel. Here goes...
My Dirty Little Secrets (or at least the 15 I am willing to share)
1) I LOVE Cereal. I would love to have a diet purely of cereal. I could eat it for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and all snacks in between. Often times I eat it right out of the box; milk not required. I wish they would sell boxes of cereal at the Theater, cuz it's the perfect movie-watching snack. Oh - and sometimes, I hide the good cereal from my kids, so I can have it all to myself. Did you know that Frosted Flakes are really good crushed up in the middle of a pb sandwich? So is Raisin Bran, by the way. The times where I have eaten a WHOLE box of cereal in one sitting (straight from the box - no milk) are too numerous to count.
2) I LOVE My Daughter's Music. Ok, so this is purely a confession. A few years ago, Noggin used to spotlight some of Laurie Berkner's music videos as fillers in between kid shows. I loved her quirky lyrics and her singer-songwriter style on her acoustic guitar. PrettyPrettyPrincess loved her music too, so it was a great "excuse" to buy it. We would listen to it in the car ALL the time. Now that PrettyPrettyPrincess is a little older, we don't listen to it as much. However, I still crank it up from time to time. The boys will ask, "Why are you listening to that?" "Oh...um...PrettyPrettyPrincess was." "Uh, right. She's not even in the room," they point out. Guilty as charged, dang it!
3) I prefer to take one route to my destination and a different route home. I don't know why I do this. MrBusDr did this ALL the time while I was growing up. I LOVE taking back roads as much as possible too. Scenery reminds me of home.
4) I LOVE romance in a movie! In fact, I tend to get really irritated if the two characters are obviously attracted to one another, but never act on it! Take Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium for example. There is definitely chemistry between characters Molly Mahoney and the skeptical accountant, Henry. As the movie nears the end, I patiently await the magical moment, the moment where their lips will meet. It's coming, it's coming...they look into each other's eyes...and "What?" I sit up and exclaim as the credits begin to roll. "No Kiss???" PrettyPrettyPrincess, who is snuggled up next to me in the bed sits up too and says, "This is a kids movie, mom! It wouldn't be appropriate!" "Nonsense," I contend. "Cinderella & Prince Charming kissed."
5) I am a water-waster! I know that when I reveal this little confession, all of you "green" & eco-friendly giants out there will petition to have my head. However, I love soaking in long hot bubble baths. It is my place of solitude from the "outside world" (the off-spring). But that's not the "wasteful" part. See, after using about 30 gallons to soak, I still need to wash my hair. So, I drain the tub, and immediately take a quick shower, using perhaps another 7-8 gallons. I know, I know - wasteful! But I just cannot give up my long soaks. I have, however, cut back to just one long soak per week.
6) I have been converted to Wal-Martism. For years, friends and family members used to proselyte about their "great deals". I was a non-believer. I resisted; treating it like the anti-Christ of shopping centers. The aisles were crowded, the store dirty, the help not helpful, and apparently the fact that you didn't have to "dress up" to shop there was the Carte Blanche some folks needed to avoid brushing their teeth or slapping on a bra before making their entrance. Then something glorious happened. A Wal-Mart Super Center opened up in a location near me. It was around 2 am, and I needed to make an after-midnight run in search of must-have marshmallows & chocolate chips. I was converted! My "Indoor S'Mores" would be resurrected, thanks to Wal-Mart! I must clarify that while Tar-jay and Kohl's remain my favorite discount retailers and Dick's my #1 grocer, I am a part-time Wal-Martisan...but only "after hours". Oh - and for the record - I ALWAYS wear a bra!
7) I enjoy "different" foods. For example, I love slightly salted stewed tomatoes! Yum! I was first introduced to this tasty "treat" during cafeteria lunch at Middlebury Elementary. I loved the stewed tomatoes so much, I used to trade other kids their tomatoes for my dessert! Weird, I know. I also just happen to love PB & Pickle sandwiches, deli sandwiches with crushed up potato chips in the middle, and grilled cheese with thinly sliced apples on the inside. Oh, and Mac & Cheese is also totally awesome with a spoonful of salsa mixed in. Ooh - and something that just makes my glands salivate and mouth pucker? Dill Pickle Chips! Now those are freakin awesome!
8) My dream job is to be a High School Choir Director. Not that this should come as a surprise to anyone...but it's not exactly the "dream job" people strive for. I love music. I love singing. I love choral singing. Even more so, I love conducting. It's like a work of art for me. And hearing the 4-part harmony come back to me, well that is just the reward. Maybe I'll get to go back to school and finish my degree...one day.
9) Here are my favorite TV Shows, and my favorite "dirty" TV shows that I love to watch: "Seinfeld", "The Office", "Desperate Housewives" (1st & 2nd season), "Dirty, Sexy, Money", "High School Reunion", "Men in Trees", "Brothers & Sisters", "Eli Stone", "Samantha Who?", "Pushing Daisies", "The New Adventures of Old Christine", "Carpoolers", "Journeyman", "The Riches" (1st season), and "Private Practice". (Can you guess which ones are the "dirty" ones? I know...Shame on Me.) I am secretly looking forward to the new Fall Season...perhaps there will be some new "dirty" shows to add to my list. Hahaha.
10) I shave my Feet! Eww - Gross, I know. But, it isn't like I have TONS of unruly hair bursting from my podalic apendages, causing me to "mow" everyday or anything. It's just that occassionally I notice a few little hairs sprouting from the tops of my toes or feet. And well, it's a little unsightly, so I shave!
11) I love to travel. I love to take road trips. I love to make lists. I love to plan itineraries. I love to map out my route. I love the packing, and I even love the driving. I love eating the junk food on the way. I love it when the entire carload breaks into song. I love the scenery. I love to fly by plane too, in spite of a little anxiety. I love when they call for my "boarding zone". I love the hum of the aircraft, and even the airline food! Places I would love to visit: Alaska, Cancun, Ireland, Australia, New Zealand, Caribbean, Belgium, Tahiti, and anywhere else in the US I haven't been to yet.
12) I am an emotional person. I realize my family won't be surprised by this little "revelation". But, I think that most others view me simply as the facetious, obnoxious gal that never shuts up. One of those fancy-schmancy high-tech "color personality tests" said I was a "Yellow", and that I use humor as a facade; to hide the fact that I am actually a sensitive person. PrettyPrettyPrincess can attest to this. Not only do I cry during sappy movies or TV shows, but I even cry at the not-so-sappy (I think I was the only one that cried during Dan In Real Life). I cry when they announce the Miss America Pageant Winner. I cry when I hear the Star Spangled Banner or the Pledge of Allegiance. I even broke into tears once just looking at the mountains. And don't even get me started talking about my life or struggles my family has gone through. I am a sap!
13) I enjoy Public Speaking. I know...this is just sick & wrong. And it isn't like I think I have anything great to say, or at least anything that would merit anyone listening. However, I must admit that public speaking gives me a rush I quite enjoy. I love researching a topic and writing about it. I love organizing the paragraphs and making sure they flow. I love implementing "new words" I have learned. And even though there is a split second of anxiety before reaching the podium, I love to share what I have studied and learned with an audience. It's like the next step... I mean, I enjoy writing, so speaking is like getting to publicly display what I have written. Again, I know...sick & wrong.
14) I love a cute bum! (Another Confession.) Some girls love a man's sensitive eyes. Some love muscular arms. Others love a strong jaw. Sure, all of those things are great. But I must admit - in fact, I couldn't deny it if I tried - I LOVE A CUTE BUM!!! Even better if he is showcasing his bum in a pair of fitted (but not too tight) jeans. Best, however, when wearing a pair of fitted, soft-brushed, corduroy camouflage pants. (Trust me...I've seen it.) Y-U-M-M-Y. (I told you some of these "secrets" were "dirty".)
15) I am a Blog-Hog! This should come as no surprise to ANY of you reading this. It's just cleansing for me to be able to admit it! What can I say??? I've already told you how much I enjoy writing! And y'all know how much I enjoy talking. So, if you and I were here right now...well, basically I blog about what I would be talking about. And what's the point of "talking" to yourself right? I love reading other people's blogs and commenting on them, and love it even more when they do the same in return. It's an insatiable thirst for Blog!
That being said, go ahead...Quench the Blog! Tell me what some of your "dirty" little secrets are! Or better yet - Blog about them and I'll be over for confessionals later!
A while ago my friend, Emily did a post called "100 Things About Me" and her sister Ann did one called "Have You Ever..." Both of these posts made me think of my own idiosyncrasies that no one knows about. I know what you're thinking: "Perhaps those things should remain unknown."
Too bad...I'm posting these anyway, and you will just have to deal with it. What's that my dad used to say? "You will read it, and you will like it"? Oh, wait...I think it was "eat" not "read". Well, never mind then. Just read, and if you don't like what you see...change the channel. Here goes...
My Dirty Little Secrets (or at least the 15 I am willing to share)
1) I LOVE Cereal. I would love to have a diet purely of cereal. I could eat it for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and all snacks in between. Often times I eat it right out of the box; milk not required. I wish they would sell boxes of cereal at the Theater, cuz it's the perfect movie-watching snack. Oh - and sometimes, I hide the good cereal from my kids, so I can have it all to myself. Did you know that Frosted Flakes are really good crushed up in the middle of a pb sandwich? So is Raisin Bran, by the way. The times where I have eaten a WHOLE box of cereal in one sitting (straight from the box - no milk) are too numerous to count.
2) I LOVE My Daughter's Music. Ok, so this is purely a confession. A few years ago, Noggin used to spotlight some of Laurie Berkner's music videos as fillers in between kid shows. I loved her quirky lyrics and her singer-songwriter style on her acoustic guitar. PrettyPrettyPrincess loved her music too, so it was a great "excuse" to buy it. We would listen to it in the car ALL the time. Now that PrettyPrettyPrincess is a little older, we don't listen to it as much. However, I still crank it up from time to time. The boys will ask, "Why are you listening to that?" "Oh...um...PrettyPrettyPrincess was." "Uh, right. She's not even in the room," they point out. Guilty as charged, dang it!
3) I prefer to take one route to my destination and a different route home. I don't know why I do this. MrBusDr did this ALL the time while I was growing up. I LOVE taking back roads as much as possible too. Scenery reminds me of home.
4) I LOVE romance in a movie! In fact, I tend to get really irritated if the two characters are obviously attracted to one another, but never act on it! Take Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium for example. There is definitely chemistry between characters Molly Mahoney and the skeptical accountant, Henry. As the movie nears the end, I patiently await the magical moment, the moment where their lips will meet. It's coming, it's coming...they look into each other's eyes...and "What?" I sit up and exclaim as the credits begin to roll. "No Kiss???" PrettyPrettyPrincess, who is snuggled up next to me in the bed sits up too and says, "This is a kids movie, mom! It wouldn't be appropriate!" "Nonsense," I contend. "Cinderella & Prince Charming kissed."
5) I am a water-waster! I know that when I reveal this little confession, all of you "green" & eco-friendly giants out there will petition to have my head. However, I love soaking in long hot bubble baths. It is my place of solitude from the "outside world" (the off-spring). But that's not the "wasteful" part. See, after using about 30 gallons to soak, I still need to wash my hair. So, I drain the tub, and immediately take a quick shower, using perhaps another 7-8 gallons. I know, I know - wasteful! But I just cannot give up my long soaks. I have, however, cut back to just one long soak per week.
6) I have been converted to Wal-Martism. For years, friends and family members used to proselyte about their "great deals". I was a non-believer. I resisted; treating it like the anti-Christ of shopping centers. The aisles were crowded, the store dirty, the help not helpful, and apparently the fact that you didn't have to "dress up" to shop there was the Carte Blanche some folks needed to avoid brushing their teeth or slapping on a bra before making their entrance. Then something glorious happened. A Wal-Mart Super Center opened up in a location near me. It was around 2 am, and I needed to make an after-midnight run in search of must-have marshmallows & chocolate chips. I was converted! My "Indoor S'Mores" would be resurrected, thanks to Wal-Mart! I must clarify that while Tar-jay and Kohl's remain my favorite discount retailers and Dick's my #1 grocer, I am a part-time Wal-Martisan...but only "after hours". Oh - and for the record - I ALWAYS wear a bra!
7) I enjoy "different" foods. For example, I love slightly salted stewed tomatoes! Yum! I was first introduced to this tasty "treat" during cafeteria lunch at Middlebury Elementary. I loved the stewed tomatoes so much, I used to trade other kids their tomatoes for my dessert! Weird, I know. I also just happen to love PB & Pickle sandwiches, deli sandwiches with crushed up potato chips in the middle, and grilled cheese with thinly sliced apples on the inside. Oh, and Mac & Cheese is also totally awesome with a spoonful of salsa mixed in. Ooh - and something that just makes my glands salivate and mouth pucker? Dill Pickle Chips! Now those are freakin awesome!
8) My dream job is to be a High School Choir Director. Not that this should come as a surprise to anyone...but it's not exactly the "dream job" people strive for. I love music. I love singing. I love choral singing. Even more so, I love conducting. It's like a work of art for me. And hearing the 4-part harmony come back to me, well that is just the reward. Maybe I'll get to go back to school and finish my degree...one day.
9) Here are my favorite TV Shows, and my favorite "dirty" TV shows that I love to watch: "Seinfeld", "The Office", "Desperate Housewives" (1st & 2nd season), "Dirty, Sexy, Money", "High School Reunion", "Men in Trees", "Brothers & Sisters", "Eli Stone", "Samantha Who?", "Pushing Daisies", "The New Adventures of Old Christine", "Carpoolers", "Journeyman", "The Riches" (1st season), and "Private Practice". (Can you guess which ones are the "dirty" ones? I know...Shame on Me.) I am secretly looking forward to the new Fall Season...perhaps there will be some new "dirty" shows to add to my list. Hahaha.
10) I shave my Feet! Eww - Gross, I know. But, it isn't like I have TONS of unruly hair bursting from my podalic apendages, causing me to "mow" everyday or anything. It's just that occassionally I notice a few little hairs sprouting from the tops of my toes or feet. And well, it's a little unsightly, so I shave!
11) I love to travel. I love to take road trips. I love to make lists. I love to plan itineraries. I love to map out my route. I love the packing, and I even love the driving. I love eating the junk food on the way. I love it when the entire carload breaks into song. I love the scenery. I love to fly by plane too, in spite of a little anxiety. I love when they call for my "boarding zone". I love the hum of the aircraft, and even the airline food! Places I would love to visit: Alaska, Cancun, Ireland, Australia, New Zealand, Caribbean, Belgium, Tahiti, and anywhere else in the US I haven't been to yet.
12) I am an emotional person. I realize my family won't be surprised by this little "revelation". But, I think that most others view me simply as the facetious, obnoxious gal that never shuts up. One of those fancy-schmancy high-tech "color personality tests" said I was a "Yellow", and that I use humor as a facade; to hide the fact that I am actually a sensitive person. PrettyPrettyPrincess can attest to this. Not only do I cry during sappy movies or TV shows, but I even cry at the not-so-sappy (I think I was the only one that cried during Dan In Real Life). I cry when they announce the Miss America Pageant Winner. I cry when I hear the Star Spangled Banner or the Pledge of Allegiance. I even broke into tears once just looking at the mountains. And don't even get me started talking about my life or struggles my family has gone through. I am a sap!
13) I enjoy Public Speaking. I know...this is just sick & wrong. And it isn't like I think I have anything great to say, or at least anything that would merit anyone listening. However, I must admit that public speaking gives me a rush I quite enjoy. I love researching a topic and writing about it. I love organizing the paragraphs and making sure they flow. I love implementing "new words" I have learned. And even though there is a split second of anxiety before reaching the podium, I love to share what I have studied and learned with an audience. It's like the next step... I mean, I enjoy writing, so speaking is like getting to publicly display what I have written. Again, I know...sick & wrong.
14) I love a cute bum! (Another Confession.) Some girls love a man's sensitive eyes. Some love muscular arms. Others love a strong jaw. Sure, all of those things are great. But I must admit - in fact, I couldn't deny it if I tried - I LOVE A CUTE BUM!!! Even better if he is showcasing his bum in a pair of fitted (but not too tight) jeans. Best, however, when wearing a pair of fitted, soft-brushed, corduroy camouflage pants. (Trust me...I've seen it.) Y-U-M-M-Y. (I told you some of these "secrets" were "dirty".)
15) I am a Blog-Hog! This should come as no surprise to ANY of you reading this. It's just cleansing for me to be able to admit it! What can I say??? I've already told you how much I enjoy writing! And y'all know how much I enjoy talking. So, if you and I were here right now...well, basically I blog about what I would be talking about. And what's the point of "talking" to yourself right? I love reading other people's blogs and commenting on them, and love it even more when they do the same in return. It's an insatiable thirst for Blog!
That being said, go ahead...Quench the Blog! Tell me what some of your "dirty" little secrets are! Or better yet - Blog about them and I'll be over for confessionals later!
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