Off-Track Homework Keeps {Some} Kids On Track

My youngest is in year-round school and is currently off-track. (They go roughly 8-9 weeks on and then 3 weeks off).  Even though I am not a huge fan of year-round school, it works out okay for us, mostly because last year my college-age son was home nearly every morning and this year I have a high schooler doing online school. It's nice that he isn't home alone and that he is old enough to make his own pb&j and can play by himself. However, he still lacks the self-directed motivation to be productive each day, especially while the others at home have to work on their own school work. 

The hardest part (and a huge reason I don't care for year-round) is with his ADHD anytime he goes off his routine (when they go off-track) it is a HUGE deal to try to get him settled when he goes back on. It's a rough 2-week adjustment period after every 3 week break. He finally gets settled only to go back off track nearly 6 weeks later. Yo-yo effect. 

Last year just before he went off-track for Christmas break the teacher sent home a pretty thick math booklet that the kids could work through during the break if they wanted. There was also a reading response booklet for books they would read before returning to school. 

We had our son read and work through a few pages everyday before he was allowed to have his electronic play time. I know this probably sounds strict or mean or harsh to some parents out there. After all, it is a BREAK, let him enjoy it, right? But, he actually thrives on stuff like this. He enjoys the challenge (as long as there is still play time) and he takes pride in completing each page. Never once did I have to remind him to get it done. Whenever I'd get home, he was eager to show me what he completed. You might wonder how that happened? Well...

I made him a daily checklist with things like "eat breakfast", "brush teeth", "comb hair", "2 pages math", "read 30 minutes", "1 page reading response", "eat lunch", "30 minutes electronics", "30 minutes exercise",... as well as lots of other optional activities such as writing in his journal, working on certain scout badges, working on a puzzle, "free time" with just good old fashioned non-electronic toys. I even included a rotation of simple chores, usually 1 a day in addition to make your bed. (He's 8 years old now and has been in charge of his own laundry for nearly 2 years now.) 

He liked the checklist because he got to be in charge of how fast or slow he worked on each item. He would check the box when each task was completed. Seeing that he was accomplishing things gave him the motivation and pride to do more. He started setting personal goals to get through the list faster. One day, when I got home, he asked if we could ad a second snack time to his checklist. When I asked why he said because he gets really hungry before I get home. After a few more questions, I learned he ate lunch at 9:30 in the morning, "because that was next on the list!" Ha! He did all of his morning work lickety-split, the checklist said "Eat lunch", so he did! 

With the checklists, he did the work on his own, without whining. Honestly, I was quite skeptical at first but after the first few days, I was extremely impressed that he was not only succeeding, but sticking with it and loving it. We discovered that he does really well with checklists! This was a small victory for us. 

Yesterday was day 2 of off-track. He doesn't go back until after the Thanksgiving break. There wasn't a packet sent home from his teacher this year and we've already had two days of  meltdowns. So, I am in the process of putting together my own booklet for him to work on for the next 3 weeks. I want him to definitely enjoy his break, but if the checklists work for him, then why not?

I am grateful for pinterest for making my search easy and I am so happy to find lots of FREE printables. I can pick and choose and customize his packet for him. Later tonight we will introduce his packet and new daily checklist. I am keeping my fingers crossed for no more meltdowns and no more "I'm bored" days during the rest of this break. 

No, this post isn't to guilt parents into giving their kids extra homework or anything. I am an advocate that each child is different and that the only way "no child is left behind" is when we do our best in determining what works for them, and then make it happen! I don't like labels, per se. However, I do like understanding how my children operate, what their struggles are and how best to help them. To me, this is what the "label" ADHD does; it gives me answers and steers me in the right direction of how to help.

It never ceases to amaze me how we are all so different and how each of our children are wired in their own way as well. I love that about each of us! 

Parents, if you are struggling to help one of your children with behavior, academics, or social skills, don't give up! Utilize what resources you have, and push for what you don't. Do your best and then celebrate each little victory that comes your way!

Like Calculus, With Sound

The semester started a couple of weeks ago, and once again, I'm back at it.  I'm sure I've already mentioned this - but for the sake of the post, I'll repeat that I'm a double major, pursuing both a degree in Music Education and English w/ an emphasis on Creative Writing.

A little pet peeve of mine:  When someone learns I'm studying music and they say, "Oh, that's nice", complete with synchronized nod of the head and half-smile.  Like they're saying "Oh, that's not hard at all", like they're poo-pooing it.

I asked a few non-music majors what they thought music majors did.  The most common responses I received were "learn to play an instrument" or "learn to sing".  Well, sort of.  However, the performance and pedagogy aspect are only a small aspect.

Pursuing both fields at the same time, I can tell you with 100% certainty, that pursuing a degree in music is waaaaaaaay harder than my English degree, AND there are about twice as many classes to take, as well as tons more out-of-class work required.

Studying music is extremely rigorous.  Did you know that prestigious law schools love music students?  It shows the student is dedicated and a hard worker.

The thing I least enjoy (and usually what makes or breaks the music major) is THEORY!  Blah.  But, I get it; one must understand the rules before he/she can successfully break the rules.  To give you an idea of how difficult theory is...

... yeah, it's like calculus, but with sound - and that's just from semester 1.

I still remember my first day of Theory I.  There were about 30 students crammed into a little space.  Standing room only.  Day 2, there were half.  I counted.  Half the students had dropped after taking one look at the syllabus.  Guess, they figured out it was more than learning Do-Re-Mi.  By week 2, there were 10 of us, and by the drop-deadline, there were 7.

Fast forward to Theory II.  We started with those same 7 and ended with 7.  Theory III, only 5 of us showed up.  Turns out, 2 of the ones that finished Theory II didn't get the required grade to move on and had to repeat.  Fast forward again to Theory IV. There were 3.  2 of us graduated in May with our Associates, and 1 (me), with honors. This is tough stuff!

I will say, there were nights I cried over theory homework.

Each time I pass a music class, I feel validated and I know that there is a reason I am doing this.

Because I am pursuing a Bachelor's of Music Education, I have an additional 13 or so classes more than the traditional music student.

Luckily, for me, I figured out a long time ago (through subbing) that I LOVE teaching, and I especially love conducting choir.    I also found that I love learning.  Some days I get ahead of myself and begin to contemplate possible dissertations for my Ph.D.!!!  Whoa, Nellie!  Simmer down now.  It's going to be a while just to complete my Bachelor's!

So remember, the next time someone tells you they're going into music (and if you can't talk them out of it), don't poo-poo them.  Think: "Calculus, with sound" and then offer them your condolences along with your encouragement.  :)

Competitions

Although my kids have done sports when they were younger (soccer, basketball, swimming, gymnastics, etc.), as they get older they tend to gravitate towards other fields such as academics and the arts, and they usually do pretty well too.  I'm not gonna lie -- sometimes I feel a little proud of my kids.

LittleDuckling usually attends a district chess competition each year and always has fun.  His Jr. High team often places and moves on to the regionals up at the U of U (I think he mostly enjoys getting out of school for the day to attend! haha.).  He's a little concerned about what will happen to the chess team now, since the teacher/coach passed away last month...  :(   I hope the new faculty sponsor will have just as much fun with the kids as Mr. Gadd did! (We miss you, Mr. Gadd!)

This has also been a great year for my Senior, Keenan as well.  If we're friends on Facebook, no doubt you saw my plethora of posts about his work in the high school musical, Grease.  His solos were great and the audience totally loved him; he ate it up.  This past Wednesday night he took first place for his monologue at the Regional Drama Competition.  He was way excited, as am I. 

PrettyPrettyPrincess has had some successes of her own this year as well.  It started off with the yearbook cover design competition.  Her art submission won and was selected to be the cover of the yearbook this year.  So, of course we HAD to order a yearbook.  I haven't seen it yet, but I am way excited for her.  Her History Fair project placed at the school level and yesterday morning we got up bright and early so I could drive her up to the district for the District Level Competition.  Parents weren't allowed to stay, since the judges were roaming around, interviewing the kids on their projects, etc.  So, I hope we find out how she did soon.  And finally, she won her school's "Keyoff", typing at 70 wpm with ~0~ mistakes.  She goes to the District "Keyoff" next week.  They are little achievements and even if she doesn't come in first place, I am proud of her.

Yes, I think I do have amazing kids.  Many times they enter these competitions without me even knowing until they've placed!  Crazy how motivated they become.  But even if they don't win, I am happy they are learning the value of hard work and that it does pay off.  These are great life skills!

World's Greatest Essay

My nephew wrote a paper recently.  Truthfully, when I read his work I was stunned and amazed.  In fact, this is definitely one of the best essays, if not the Greatest Essay ever written!  Read on and see for yourself!
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{{Click pic to enlarge}}

My Ant Loves Me, by Dougan

My Ant Emma loves me. My ant is nice to me.  I know that she loves me because she plays games with me and sings to me.  We play games and sing songs together. I think that she is the best ant to have.


Best paper EVER!  Am I right?    Oh yeah... and "Ant" Emma...  //snickers//.

Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes

Over the course of the past few weeks, I haven't slept very much.  Not that I'm a good sleeper anyway, as you all well know.  But it seems to have been more restless than normal. (Here is where I save you the trouble of telling me which meds to try...  Melatonin doesn't work for me.  Ambien puts me to sleep, but then I'm wide awake 2-3 hours later.  The other one (Lunesta?  I can't remember), including the OTC sleeping aids, makes me feel groggy too long the next day.  Xanax I LOVE, and it works, but I take sparingly because I only get so many refills for so few pills per month.)

Anyway -- I am a tosser and a turner.  And probably will be until my life settles down (will it ever settle down?).   I just can't seem to turn my mind off, or get comfortable long enough to turn my mind off.  I've got all sorts of things going on, which I know all of you already know about.  Being a mom to kids, working a full-time job, being a 3/4-time student, actively involved in my church and the local "mid-singles" group (aka, my "social life"), and the gym, when I can squeeze it in.   So, needless to say, I'm always go-go-gadget-going.

Also over the course of the past two weeks, my body feels like it's falling apart a little.  My right knee is always achy.  But then my left knee decided to join in.  I threw my shoulder out and could barely move it for days.  Then I got a kink in my left shoulder causing tension in the base of my neck, leading to a migraine.  And then I woke up yesterday with a stiff neck on the right side!

I'm not writing all of this as if to say, "Wo is me... poor me... feel sorry for me!"  I realized yesterday that my body is trying to keep up with my mind and due to my malnourished sleep-life, it can't do it anymore.  I need to find ways to relax, and more often.  I thought about the last time I slept really well, and it was when I was getting weekly massages.

Because of the whole cost factor, I probably won't go back to weekly massages.  However, just like when I bought my new mattress set last year, I think I need to look at massages as an investment to my health.  For reals...  I started visiting my chiropractor again last week and while he's been putting me back together, I really do think I need regular massages to keep me going.

I think there is something very healing about massages, and not just because it relaxes the body.  But for me, it helps me clear my mind, and slow my thoughts down so I can actually process them at a pace that makes sense.  Wouldn't you agree that's worth it?

If only insurance companies would agree.

30 Days of Gratitude: Day Sixteen

Today I am grateful for talents.

Each of us were born with certain gifts and talents.  Typically we discover our talents as we experiment and try new things.  The things we seems to have a natural appreciation for or a natural "knack" for -- those are the gifts we must work and grow into talents.  I am grateful that many of my family and friends and YOU have shared your talents with me throughout the years.  There are many things I am not good at and yet I can enjoy them through other people.

One of my talents I've been working on is writing.  It's been a goal of mine to get published.  I am currently taking a novel writing class (among others) and it's really been beneficial in expanding the way I write.  Our school does a literary publication twice a year, in which they publish winning entries from each semester.  I submitted a completed chapter from my manuscript and was recently notified that it was accepted and it's due to be published in Folio in just a few weeks.  They also invited me to do a 5-minute reading at the launch party.

I know it's just a simple community college competition, and it's a small publication by comparison.  But to me, it's exciting.  It's something I can now add to my resume and it's something that is going to be out there - with MY name on it.  I feel blessed that God has blessed me with the ability and the drive to develop this talent.

I am so grateful for talents.

30 Days of Gratitude: Day Ten

Today I am sort of sick of school, so I decided I better find some gratitude for it.

When I started back two years ago, I wasn't sure how long it was going to take me.  And so far, it's taking a while, which is what I sort of expected.  Honestly, I was a wee bit scared of some of the classes I'd have to take, like Biology, Political Science or any other course that wasn't "easy" for me.  

Maybe it was luck, perhaps I ended up getting "easy" instructors, or it might even be possible I was creating my own vortex of synergy that just couldn't be stopped (y'know - the whole "object in perpetual motion" thing) -- but I was getting good grades.  And not only was I getting good grades, I was getting all A's.  That first semester of receiving all A's sort of "ruined" me, because after that, I wanted more A's the next semester and the semester after that and after that and-- I was getting them!  

Being in school was starting to make me feel really smart and I learned that I love learning.  There are times, like in between semesters, when I feel like my brain is starving and I just can't wait for the new semester to start.  Weird, I know.  

Looking back, it doesn't make sense how I even managed to get the A's.  Seriously, the centrifugal forces of my life (kids, work, church duties) kept me quite busy and yet somehow I was able to accomplish homework in about half the time it should have taken me.  I'd be foolish and ungrateful if I thought it was all me.  I know there were many nights I fell asleep in the books in which I should have struggled a bit more the next day on the exams.  I know that the Lord had a hand in making up the difference, and for that I am truly blessed.

Even though I get tired of the homework and tired of the rotating, chaotic schedules each new semester, I don't get tired of the achievement I feel each time I complete another class.

I am grateful for school.

The Memoir

I have always loved writing, as far back as I can remember. I enjoyed writing poems in grade school, but I liked writing stories even more.

I didn't ever think of writing something with the potential of others every reading it, though. I just wrote for my own enjoyment. It wasn't until I was in a high school creative writing class did my teacher really encourage me. She continued to say time and time again that I had a "gift". Although I felt I struggled with writing at times, I think I am finally beginning to understand what she meant. Let me explain.

Fast forward to January, 2011. I sat down in an "Intro to Fiction Writing" class in college. On the first day the instructor asked us to go around the room and introduce ourselves by 1) Saying our name and 2) the genre we enjoy writing in.

Genre? Hmm. I had never really given any thought up until that moment about genre. Here I was writing a few short stories here and there and I never really thought about genre at all. I had about 2 minutes before it was my turn and I quickly thought about the things I had written up to that point as well as the type of fiction I had enjoyed reading. I decided that my "genre" was realism. Sometimes my pieces had a little hint of romance, sometimes a hint of mystery. I always like to have an element of humor or quirkiness, but yes, overall my "genre" would be Realism. So, that's what I said.

I should tell you that once I "discovered" my genre, it was actually easier to write. I didn't feel limited to only write realistic things. But I guess it helped me write with a particular audience in mind. That class was great as the instructor pushed us to write in genres we typically didn't. I feel I grew a lot as a writer in that class. It wasn't my first college writing class, but she was just a very eccentric instructor that helped me see things differently, and who took joy from edging me out of my comfort zone, or so it seemed.

Then over the summer, I took another creative writing class. In that class we discussed everything from poetry, to prose, to fabulist fiction, and even non-fiction. Non-Fiction? In Creative Writing? Well, that is what I thought the first time he mentioned it. In my mind, I kept picturing writing instruction manuals "Creatively", or writing a biography filled with hyperbole. I just couldn't wrap my head around the idea of creative non-fiction. Then I read David Sedaris. Then I LISTENED to David Sedaris read some of his own works. Hmmm... I thought. This is like blogging.

Then we had an assignment to WRITE a piece of creative non-fiction, otherwise known as Narrative Non-Fiction. I panicked. I wasn't sure what I should write about. I had a lot going on that week, and I felt fresh out of ideas. Then it hit me. I have been writing narrative non-fiction as long as I have had this blog! I skimmed through my blog and copied and pasted one of my favorite entries, tweaking a few things here and there. Honestly, I didn't think it was my best piece. But like I said, I was out of ideas.

However, when the instructor returned it to me, I had received 100%. His commentary was better than expected and he gave me great suggestions for improving it. At the end of the semester, he did a "conference" with each of us one-on-one. This, by far, was the best thing ever. Because he went through my portfolio and we discussed each of the assignment pieces I had written. He went back to the narrative nonfiction piece, a memoir and really encouraged me to choose that one for my final project. He then told me that I had a way of sharing my experiences that made others want to read them. He said I had some funny insights, and a clever way of putting things, but that the important part was that I wasn't afraid to lay it all out on the line. I am a REVEALOR, he said. I laughed and said, "you mean I share too much?" (Because I've heard that before!) He laughed and said, "The fact that you are so open about your experiences and your thoughts on those experiences is what makes it great. Most people don't share the things you are willing to share. That's why they like reading them."

So, the memoir it was. I worked and worked on it and then presented it to the class for my final piece. I got some good feedback, ways to make it better, etc. I was also met with some criticism as well. A few class members did not like how I worded a few things. They felt it was too personal. The instructor came to my defense and said "This is what sells. If she's smart, she will take it and turn it into a full-length manuscript and try to get it sold."

I should explain that during these review sessions, the class critiques your work and the writer is not allowed to speak. So, there I sat taking it all in. I couldn't explain or defend myself at all. And when he said that, I also had to refrain from jumping up and down. This was the biggest compliment of all.

This past week, I started the fall semester and I have a novel writing class. My instructor's new novel has just come out {more about that here} so he definitely has credibility. He told us in our first class that his goal for us is to get us well on our way with a solid novel. The first day he asked us to introduce ourselves and tell the class what we were working on. I could honestly say that I am working on a narrative nonfiction.

The more I work on this piece, the more excited I become. I don't know why I never realized that I prefer "narrative nonfiction" over "realism fiction". I mean, haven't I been doing that this whole time I've been blogging? Also, when I look back through my high school creative writing assignments (yes, I kept those), it was the creative NONfiction pieces that my teacher always seemed to love best. I even pulled out stuff from my freshman year of college (Circa 1992) and noticed that my best pieces were also non-fiction. (I wrote about my first kiss!)

So, that's what I am currently working on at the moment, the memoir. Hopefully, my family will not kill me over anything I "divulge". Then again, if it ever ends up selling, I'll just buy them off! haha!

Oh, and that "gift" my high school teacher once told me I had? Yeah -- well, I have finally come to understand that my "gift" is my willingness to "over share", haha.

The Beginning of an End

Today marks the beginning of an end of an era for each of my kids. It's the first day back to school.

FunnyMan is a Senior in High School.

LittleDuckling is an 8th grader.

PrettyPrettyPrincess is a 6th grader.

So -- they are each the "big cheese" on campus.

I am hoping that they will each do well this year and that we can get off on the right foot, starting the right habits. They each have their new backpacks, binders, pencils, notebooks and folders. Haircuts and new clothes/shoes have been put off since we just barely got back from our 12 day road trip and I will need to have another payday before that.

Last night I was wishing for some melatonin just so they could fall asleep easier (after pulling a plethora of all-nighters all summer long). Plus I am sure they were each a bit nervous this morning.

Keeping my fingers crossed for good reports this year!

The Assignment

I have an assignment due in just a little over 2 weeks. It's to write a journalistic essay. Specifically, I am to go someplace or do something I've never gone or done before and then write a journalistic essay on it. Lots of ideas are spewing around up in the ol' noggin. I am sure when I find "it" -- the right project -- I'll know.

I started off in the "invention" phase of my piece, brainstorming about possible topics. In doing so, I asked myself, what is something I've never done before? There were lots of things. The first few that came to mind were...

Work on a farm/ranch for a day

Rock Climbing

Ghost Hunting

Fly Fishing

Attend a Renaissance Fair or Sci-Fi Convention

Someone in class brought up visiting a nudist colony. I know that is something I could never do -- not even for the sake of an 'A' - HaHa!

Then something else came to mind. I've never attended a midnight showing of some trendy new film, such as...... a TWILIGHT movie!

I started getting all excited. Now THIS is something I would probably never do. I have never even read any of the Twilight books, nor seen any of the movies. It's not that I "hate" them... how can I hate something I know nothing about? It's just that they are not the genre of stuff I typically enjoy. Even my besties who swear on their mother's aunt's dead sister's grave that Twilight is phenomonal and that I'd just love it if I gave it a chance are hard-pressed to change my mind. And the thought of spending $9 to stand in line in the middle of the night with a bunch of Twihards just does not appeal to me. Not to mention I'd probably have to buy a big tub of popcorn and some Milk Duds just to stay awake. So, that's like, what? Another $20? I can stay at home and fall asleep to a show I don't enjoy for free!

So I says to myself, "Self," I says, "Surely there is a Twilight movie coming out soon. I mean, it's all I've been hearing about for the past week." So I pulled up the local theater and guess what I see?

There is a link right there on the home page with flashing lights and sirens which reads, "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1". I start to get excited, thinking a night with Twihards dressed in their Edward T-Shirts, drinking Diet Cokes from their Breaking Dawn Souvenir Movie cups would be just the sort of thing I could really enjoy writing about. But then, I notice the "ticker"... It's a countdown to the release date. 156 Days 02 Hrs 30 Mins 49 Secs for the release of this li'l gem. Um, really? There is a countdown for a movie that isn't even coming out until the middle of November?!?!?! Wow. I guess the Twihards are more diehard than I even imagined.

So, it's back to the drawing board for me... unless you have any better ideas?

Really? I mean, REALLY?

Ok, in case I haven't mentioned this before, I dislike drama. I know you may find that hard to believe coming from someone, shall we say, "animated" like me. But it's true. I hate drama and confrontation and tend to avoid it at all costs. KISS - Keep It Simple Stupid is more my speed. In fact I've been known to stop hanging out with certain friends in the past because all they want to do is stir the pot with gossip and drama. Ugh.

More often than not, I like to use my blog to write things I think are inspiring, thought-provoking, clever or just down-right funny. Rarely do I use it to vent. However, today is a day I must turn to the blogosphere as it is an issue that I have been mulling over now for four days, give or take a few hours, haha.

Saturday morning I went on a hike with a friend in the mountains. I was tired when I got back and a migraine ensued. I dropped PrettyPrettyPrincess off at a birthday party, came home took some meds and laid down for a nap. I don't know how much time had passed, but I was awakened from a deep sleep by the doorbell. In a half-daze I went to the door and there stood a mother of a student (Let's call her Jane) from my daughter's class. She wanted to speak to my daughter. But since she wasn't home she proceeded to tell me instead. She handed me a letter claiming that my daughter and 4 other girls wrote this letter and gave it to "Jane" on the last day of school. I wasn't going to post the letter, but I think in order to get a clear perspective I'm going to now. Here is what the letter said:

"We are very sorry we have to write this. We hope you will understand what we are about to say. We have realized that you have been drifting away from us and so have we. It is time we should stop being friends. We hope you will still be an acquaintance and we will not be enemies. In the past we were all perfect for each other and we balanced each other out. But now, we have grown apart. Metaphorically speaking, we are six trees, each of us a different kind. Let's say that in the beginning your tree was an Aspen, but now you are a Maple and we don't cooperate well with Maples. Please understand our situation. Sincerely, Your Acquaintances."

Ok - upon first reading it, I was a little surprised as it sounds like the other "trees" are purposely not going to "cooperate" with Jane. Again, I was in a deep fog and didn't really say much to Jane's mother. She continued to talk, stating that the girls have 1 more year of elementary school together (and they WILL be in the same classroom, since they are all in the gifted/talented program) and that they "need to learn to be friends for at least one more year." Jane's mother continued to tell me that she had already visited the other's girls' homes and even told one girl, "Izzy" in front of her mother, "Shame on you. You are a student body officer. People look up to you, you're supposed to be an example." Anyway, the mother left a copy of the letter with me and I told her I would ask PrettyPrettyPrincess about it. The mother said she wanted to inform me because she believes that PrettyPrettyPrincess is being influenced by these girls. Then the mother said they are "in the book" if PrettyPrettyPrincess would like to call Jane to apologize later.

When I picked up PrettyPrettyPrincess from the party I simply asked, "Who's Jane?" She replied, "A girl from school. Why?" I asked, "Are you friends with her?" To which she replied, "No." I then asked, "Why is that?" She replied, "Because she's never liked me." I further asked, "Why do you say that?" To which she replied, "Several times throughout the year she will tell the girls in my class not to hang out with me. I don't even know why." I asked, "Have you ever done anything mean to her?" She replied, "No Mom. She is the girl that has been mean to us all year long." And as the conversation continued, I gathered that Jane is a pot-stirrer. She basically cycles through the girls, trying to exclude one from the others and then after a while will move on to the next one. I asked PrettyPrettyPrincess about the letter. She said that she did not write it and knew that 2 of the other girls had discussed it. But basically, they were all tired of her drama and they decided they did not want to be friends with her anymore.

I advised PrettyPrettyPrincess that while she does not have to be friends with anyone who makes her feel uncomfortable, she still needs to be friendly. I advised her that the better solutions would have been to either ignore the situation or if they felt it bad enough to sit down and talk to Jane and specifically explain what they felt the problems were. The letter was too vague and only made it seem like 5 girls against 1. I then asked her if she felt like she should apologize to Jane. She said, no, and that she didn't feel she had done anything wrong.

Now, at that point I was going to let it go. But then the other mothers started to email and call. There was supposed to be a "school's out party" this weekend, put on by this other girl "E" and PrettyPrettyPrincess. E's mom told her that as a consequence of the letter there would be no party, as E is the one who wrote the letter. I also found out that the issue began last year via an email exchange in which Jane told the other girls not to be friends with E anymore. When E asked her why she would do this she replied, "Because you're a freak. A big fat freak." It was cyber-bullying, so E's mom printed it off and took it to Jane's mother.

So where does this leave me now? The other mothers are all going to make their daughters apologize. The more I read and reread the letter, the more I don't see anything mean. Now that I know the history I think these girls handled themselves fairly well for 11 year-olds. They tried to take care of it themselves. Their words were not demeaning. They were not hateful. They obviously put a lot of thought into it -- I mean who says "Metaphorically speaking...?"

I do realize that the letter probably came as a shock to Jane. And that perhaps the bluntness of "It is time that we should stop being friends" may have felt like a slap. But really?

My problem is, if PrettyPrettyPrincess does not apologize she will be the only one, and will this cause her more grief next year? Furthermore, after stewing over this the past 4 days (give or take a few hours) I can't help but feel Jane's mother is a bit manipulative. I mean, what she said to "Izzy" -- isn't that sort of bullying? And then there is the bit where she told me, "I'm in the book if PrettyPrettyPrincess wants to call to apologize", letting me clearly know that an apology is expected. There are a lot of things I can tolerate, but manipulation isn't one of them.

Do I need to do anything more? Do I talk to the mother? Or am I best to just let it go and hope that PrettyPrettyPrincess doesn't get the wrath of it down the road? Or should I tell PrettyPrettyPrincess that apologizing for something she didn't do wrong is being the bigger person?

What would you do?

Okay -- feeling better already...

My Piano Solo: Fantasia

This is the piece I performed for my student recital. I wish I would have thought to have someone take a video of that performance as the sound was so much better on that $100k Steinway 9 ft grand piano.

This recording is on my home piano and from my cell phone. The piece is "Fantasia" written by Jeanine Yeager. I love this piece and for some reason it reminds me of Water, both in it's calming and destructive stages. I added clips to the music to illustrate how the music affects me. :)

Xanax, Prayer, and A Hundred-Grand Piano

Have I mentioned I have anxiety? I think I may have mentioned it once, or twice, or... a million times! haha!

About 4 weeks ago I went to my private piano lesson with my college instructor. After I do my warm-up scales she says, "Oh, I think I forgot to tell you that you will need to play a piece in front of a piano jury."

I'm all, "What? A JURY? What the heck's a JURY?"

She tells me that the jury consists of the head of the music department and the piano instructors. "Basically, it's a panel," she explains. Well, why don't they just call it a PANEL then, right? Seriously.

So, she tells me I can just perform the Sonatina I've been working on, and that the Jury is right before the recital. And just to be clear, I wasn't thrilled about having to perform in a recital either. But I knew the drill. I knew it was expected.

My instructor is awesome actually. Not only is she a rock star on the piano, she is also hilari-oso and approximately my age. So, going to see her for my weekly lessons was a lot like going to chill with a friend. We laugh-- a lot. Mostly, she'd laughed at me and my idiosyncrasies. But, it's all good. I'm a big girl, I can laugh at myself too.

So, throughout that week I worked a little harder on the Sonatina in addition to my recital piece, since now I learned I'd have to play them both. I go to my lesson three weeks ago and she says, "I think we are going to put you in the advanced recital group." I freaked. No way did I want to play in the advanced recital. My stomach churned. I asked if I could just play in the intermediate group. In my mind I was envisioning the advanced group to contain all of these virtuoso child prodigies. Li'l Beethovens or Tchaikovskys or something. But she assured me it would be fine.

Then three weeks ago she tells me, "Oh -- did I tell you you'd have to play scales for the jury too? How are your scales? Oh and your Sonatina needs to be memorized."

Well, I can play my scales, but I prefer to play them in the order of what's known as the "Circle of Fifths". Because I can just add 1 sharp each time and avoid the whole panic moment of "E Major? Crap! How many accidentals is that?!?!" But, the instructor says, "Well, they will just announce which ones they want you to play." Then I look at her and then ask, "Memorized? I don't really memorize. I mean, is there an app for that or something?" I rolled my eyes and let out a heavy sigh. The instructor laughs. Then she tells me to go ahead and run through my scales first.

Then, two weeks ago I gave my instructor a sneak-preview to How Emma Has A Meltdown. Normally I am not nervous during my lesson, but there were two guys in the room. They both had headphones on, plugged into electronic keyboards practicing. But how could I be so sure they were REALLY plugged in and that they weren't instead LISTENING to me!?!? I made several mistakes. My palms were sweaty and my breaths shallow. I finally stopped and said, "Sorry. Those guys are making me nervous." At that, the instructor got up and walked over to the 2 guys and tapped them on the shoulders. I thought how nice it was of her to ask them to leave. But -- that isn't what she did. Nope, she asked them if they wouldn't mind pulling up a chair right next to my piano so I could practice in front of an audience! Yes -- she did!

My mouth dropped. I let out a nervous chuckle. My instructor laughed and said to the guys, "This one? Yeah -- she's all about the drama." Ha! Can you believe that? I soooo started laughing. If I didn't love her I'd have been furious. But we became good enough friends that it was okay coming from her. Problem was, while I started the Sonatina in front of them all I could think of were things like, "What are these guys thinking? I wonder if they are better than me. They are probably better than me and are irritated that they have to use their practice time to sit and listen to me while I have an anxiety attack at the piano." And of course, I'd mess up and mutter something. The instructor called out, "Ah! No talking. If you stop or talk you have to start over." Well, needless to say I had to start over 3 times. After that experience she says to me, "Um. I am just going to tell the panel that I forgot to tell you to have your piece memorized. Bring your music and instead of working on memorization, work on the musicality. I just don't want you to freak out if you lose your place."

Good thinking.

So -- one week ago, give or take a few days -- was THE day. I had the Piano Jury @ 3pm but my recital wasn't until 6pm. While other students were going ahead of me for their juries, I paced outside in the hallway wishing I had a chance to practice on that specific piano beforehand. See, the jury and recital were not at the school. They were held in a performance room at a local piano store. And pianos are all different from each other. Some keys are sensitive while others are hard to play. So, practicing on the one you'll actually be performing on is always a good idea.

I think I said about a million prayers that day. I even took a half day off of work just so I could breathe a little easier. About 20 minutes before my "jury duty" I took about 1/4 Xanax. I knew a whole one would put me to sleep and I didn't know if a 1/2 one would make me too groggy to play. So, I took a 1/4. Then I said about a million more prayers.

It was my turn and I walked into the room and my instructor introduces me to the jury members and I ask, "Ok, what do you want me to do first?" She replies with, "Well, how far did we get on your scales?" I said, "Um, I think we got through all of the sharps." She then turns to the panel and says, "I totally forgot to tell her until the last minute she'd have to do scales." Then she looks at me and says, "Why don't you go ahead and play your piece first." So I announced I'd be playing the 3rd movement to Clementi's Sonatina, Opus 36, Number 5. My heart was pounding so hard I thought it might leap through my chest. I sat down, took a deep breath and looked at the music. I tried to "hear" the first few measures in my head and then I went for it. At first I was a little nervous, but once I started playing, I realized it sounded really, really good. This was an awesome piano! At the end they told me it was flawless and great and the head of the department said that I "executed nice clean, crisp finger runs." I smiled and I said "I think this is a magical piano." Then they said that was all and dismissed me. They didn't even ask me to play scales. I could hear through the door that the students both before and after me had to play scales. How did I get off so easy?

Whew, one down. One to go. It wasn't worth it driving home and back in between as I lived about 30 minutes away and I didn't want to risk it with rush hour traffic. By 4pm I realized I was starving and was so nervous I had forgotten to eat lunch. I knew that if I didn't eat something I'd feel like passing out before the 6pm recital. I drove down the street and when I spotted the Cheesecake Factory, I figured I'd go and get a little sumthin-sumthin. After all, no kids! w00t! I sat at the bar and ordered my diet cherry coke, with real maraschino cherries and cherry grenadine flavoring. Yumm-O! I stared blankly at the golf tournament on the Flat Screen at the bar. I eat a little something and then start thinking about the recital. I think the bartender brought me a total of 6 Diet Cherry Cokes! I took another 1/4 Xanax because I could feel my nerves beginning to pulsate again. I think I said about another million prayers or so.

I make it back in time to sit through and listen to the 5 pm recital. I noticed that everyone seemed nervous and not one person played without a mistake. This did make me feel better. finally it was 6pm. I looked at the program. I was #5. The 4 before me all made a tiny mistake here or there. This also made me feel much better. It was my turn.

I walked up to the piano and pulled out the 6 pages I had taped together and spread them across the music rack. Then I took a deep breath and looked at the first few measures to get it in my head and -- ooops. It was upside down. I turned it over, producing laughter from the audience -- just a little tension reliever I suppose. I took another deep breath and began.

I swear -- that piano really is magical. My piece was an awesome piece full of varying dynamics and tempos, but this piano really helped to bring those things out. My heart stopped pounding after about the 3rd measure and I was able to just get lost in the piece. It was like I completely forgot about the audience. I mean, I knew they were there, but it was like they were just a dream or something. They didn't seem real enough to me at that moment.

Prior to that moment, I had never played that particular piece without at least one mistake. I should mention that since that moment I haven't either. But IN that moment, I nailed it. I played it better than I had ever played it before. It was miraculous, I swear. At the end, I couldn't help but look right over at my instructor. She was grinning from ear to ear and looked as if she might just cry. Which of course then made me feel like crying. I could tell she was excited for me and was proud of me. And truth be told I was excited for me too. I went back and took my seat and no one after me, save it one other student, performed their piece without a mistake.

When it was all over my instructor rushed over to me and hugged me and told me that was awesome. I told her it was that magical piano. She then said, "Well, it better be a good piano. It costs $100,000!" Whoa, right?

I don't know if I will ever perform a piece mistake-free again. But I will say this, a little Xanax, lots of prayer and a hundred-thousand dollar piano goes a long way!

Hacking, Finals & Prom

I know these each probably deserve their own posts, but too tired. Haha.

Okay, first off -- Hacking and Computer Viruses. I think we've all dealt with this in some form or another. It's easy to detect if we get an email from someone we don't know and the subject line says something like "Viagra for $.99!" Delete, right? (Well, all except Robb Logger, I bet! haha).

Anyway -- but what about when the message in your inbox is seemingly from someone you know? And it usually DOESN'T have a subject line? Happens all of the time. So, in many cases you open it before realizing what it is. Usually these viruses are activated just by simply opening the email. And then it automatically copies your contacts list and generates the same email to all of your contacts.

The last way that email viruses seem to happen is that the email is from someone you may or may not know and DOES have a subject line; something obscure like, "Check out this pic I found of you!" And then you open it and there is a link for you to click on. As soon as you click that link, ~BAM~ virus.

So -- here are some things to remember:

1) If you see an email from someone you do not know, DELETE IT. DO NOT OPEN.

2) If you receive an email with nothing in the subject line, DELETE IT. DO NOT OPEN.

3) If there is an "odd" message with a link, DELETE IT. DO NOT OPEN.

AND FINALLY -- and here is one of the most important parts:

4) Change your email password ASAP.

And then send an email to your contacts with the subject line something like, "It looks like my email account was hacked" so that they know not to open the previous one, in case they haven't yet.

I know I am bad about this, but I have been trying to make sure that from now on when I send out an email I ALWAYS put a subject in the subject line. I am asking you to do the same. Chances are, if you send me an email with nothing in the subject line, I will just delete it without opening. So, if I don't show up to your birthday party, you'll know why. Haha.

~oh~ This is also true for Facebook and Facebook Private Messages and Wall Posts. Don't open things without subject lines. Don't click on odd links. And if you've been hacked, changed your FB password (and the password to the email address associated with it) as soon as possible.

~moving on~

Finals this week~ w00t! I have one MAJOR portfolio due today. A HUGE report due. A LONG theory exam tonight. And a SCARY recital on Friday! And THEN my dear readers I will be able to catch up on reading your blogs and commenting and posting new stuff on mine. Can't wait!

And lastly... My son went to Senior Prom a few weeks ago. They went to Buca di Beppo for dinner which they said was AWESOME! If you've never been to Buca it's a fun place (at least in my opinion) and the food is authentic. I don't know if they do this at all of the locations, but they do at this one... when your table is ready, the host takes your party through a quick kitchen tour so you can see where all of the magic happens. It's a bustling place and the chefs are a lot of fun. But there is also 1 big booth IN the kitchen; front and center. So, if you're lucky enough to get a reservation for that table, it's like having your own personal cooking show. Not only that, but all of the other groups who come through get to see you and be all jealous, Haha. The waiter takes extra special care of the kitchen table and the chefs show off each dish once it's prepared, including the desserts so you can ooh and ahh over it. Well, FunnyMan called and got THAT table. They had a blast. And now for your viewing pleasure, Prom Pictures!

It's About That Time

One of my dear friends posted on her blog just the other day about how she is going through some stuff but in choosing to be happy, she bites her tongue to keep from crying. She then asked if any of her followers/friends did the same thing. I replied,

"I don't do anything to keep from crying. I just cry...until I am done crying. Sometimes it takes a LONG time to be done crying. At one point in my life I went for a very long period wherein I felt like crying and DID nearly every day. I think it lasted for about four years."

It's true. I spent a lot of time secretly (and sometimes not-so-secretly) crying. It's how I relieve stress.

Usually (at LEAST) once per semester I have a major-minor meltdown. Usually it stems from feeling overwhelmed, lots going on at home and work, lots of projects and homework for school... and very, very, VERY little sleep. Did I mention no sleep makes me cry?

It's when I get to THAT point that just about ANYTHING will trigger the tears. Someone might look at me funny, or say something that rubs me the wrong way. Or perhaps I get frustrated over a mistake I've made. Heck -- it could be some sappy commercial or a sad story on the news. It could even be (and most often is) the simple inquisition, "What's wrong?" or "Are you okay?" If someone even so much as ASKS me that while I am feeling this way -- Game Over. Let the cry-fest commence!

So yes, dear readers. It's about that time. I can feel it. The headaches are daily. The sleep is practically non-existent. The feelings of loneliness seem to be magnified. The homework is overwhelming. The work, busy. I can tell it's about that time because I've had that "lump" in my throat for a few days now.

I almost lost it at the dentist earlier, but I think it's because they had to crank the Nitrous up a little bit more than normal. I had to take a nap during lunch just to sleep off the effects.

So, just know that if I'm crying over "nothing", it's all good. I really am okay. No need to feel sorry for me... it's just how I "cope". Another 2 weeks and the semester will be over and I will get a few weeks off before the Summer semester starts.

I suppose, worse case scenario, if I don't get the tears out by the weekend I'll put a sappy movie on before finals next week! haha!

Lots Going On...

Where do I even begin?

Well, first let me say this: I will never, ever, EVER, EVER take 5 classes again during a semester while I am also working 40 hours a week. Ever. My life has been way too crazy this semester. Even last semester when I had 4 classes, it was too crazy. I vow to only take 3 or less from now on, even if that means my kids all finish college before I do. Ha. But seriously. I am making myself sick and it isn't worth the stress.

Moving on...

There was some car trading going on between siblings and my parents, etc., and I was able to "trade in" my van for a newer vehicle with much better gas mileage. It's an '09 Altima, which I already love. I had an Altima before and hands down, it was the best car I ever had. So, I am looking forward to driving this. Which brings me to the next item.

I wanted the better gas mileage because my daily routine has been changing quite a bit lately. I used to live, work and drive kids to school all within a 5 mile radius of each other. It was nice. Having a mid-sized van with a super-sized gas tank was never much of an issue because I rarely ever went anywhere. Even when I started driving to school twice a week, it wasn't that bad -- 11 miles each way. But this semester (with my crazy schedule) I've been driving to campus 5 times a week. Additionally, there is a huge construction project downtown ("Citycreek") and I have been asked to help the team that has that account. So, I've been busy-busy-busy and driving all over Salt Lake for that the past few weeks. It's been a lot of fun, though. I've been able to meet a lot of new people and I am part of something great, which makes me feel, well, GREAT! But -- the gas was killing me -- and my budget. So, again, the newer car will be fantabulous!

Only 3 1/2 more weeks until the semester is over. I still have a total of 3 more exams, 1 group project and 4 stories to crank out until then. And THEN a little, teensy, weensy break before summer term starts.

Speaking of summer -- can I just tell you how EXCITED I am for it!?!?!? I have lots of fun things planned with trips and reunions!

But in the meantime, if I talk and don't make any sense, or cry over "nothing" at the drop of a hat, just know that it's not you; it's me. Haha. At least for a few more weeks. I can do this, right?

Well, even if I can't, I am going to. And I'll do my best and laugh at myself along the way if needed!

I am Emma, hear me "roar"... tee hee.

Page 56 and the Yellow Light

What is "page 56" you ask?

Well, according to one movie critic, "page 56" is the place in the script in which the story takes a turn. This is the point in which the main character faces his toughest decision. And whether or not he succeeds triumphantly in the end is all hinged on this one big choice; especially if it's a tale of redemption.

So, I haven't been around the blog much. I know... that's not like me. I guess you can say this semester has really been kicking my butt. I know I said that LAST semester. But, truly. This semester is way harder. I have 5 classes in addition to my regular work schedule and my kids, who I have jokingly been saying that they've been busy raising themselves since I've been so busy. But it's true. I have been busy and school has been kicking my butt. I am sleeping less and when I am home I am so physically exhausted I have little or no motivation to do the things I have been needing to do. I have also been having tummy issues that appear to be stress-related.

This week is midterms. I had a panic attack during one of my Midterms on Monday. I had to stop and start over three times. Afterwards, the professor said I had no reason to have anxiety as I always do well in his class. I think it was triggered by lack of sleep, because I was up till 3am the night before just trying to get homework done.

I thought about that the entire way home and came to the realization that I am at "page 56" with regards to school. On the one hand I feel the urge to hurry and get done with everything because I am tired of being in school and I am not good with patience. On the other hand I can barely keep up with my homework and I worry that I will have to repeat a class or two if I keep this pace up.

I have approached the proverbial yellow light and I have a choice to make. Slow down, use caution and pause for a bit or speed up and hope I don't run a red light in the process. Well, if you know me well, you know that while I love adventure, the element of risk often causes me anxiety. I am not one to "speed through" yellow lights. Too much risk.

I have come to the conclusion that I need to slow down. I cannot take this type of course load again. After making that conscious decision, I happened to look online yesterday at the proposed class schedule for the summer. Ironically enough as it turns out, of all the classes I still need to take to graduate, only one of those is being offered over the summer. Coincidence? Perhaps, some may say.

I, on the other hand, feel it is a tender mercy. It is an affirmation to me that I need only take one class this summer and that all will be well, or Que sera sera, as my mother often sang to me growing up.

After midterms this week, I get a week off from classes and then the following weekend is my li'l road trip down to Moab. Gonna play on some red slick rock! Oh -- and did I tell you? Yeah, The Professor is coming too. Should be a fun weekend.

Then I will be more than halfway done with this semester and hopefully start to get my body back to normal. Of course that means back to our regularly scheduled programming on the blogosphere too. :)

Writing Assignments

I am totally loving my writing class. In spite of the fact that my instructor *sometimes* doesn't wear a bra, and in spite of the fact that she doesn't pronounce words correctly nor uses good diction, she is a pretty good writing teacher. I have her for "Intro to Writing Fiction" and I absolutely love that class.

Over the years people would tell me I should "get published", as if it were something easy to do. I mean we "get" up in the morning. We "get" dressed. We "get" to go places. And sometimes we "get" to have our cake and eat it too. So, why not "get" published? Well, unless I choose to self-publish, it isn't that simple.

First of all, I don't have any credentials. Secondly, I do not have an agent. Thirdly, I don't have the money to self-publish. And lastly -- there are tons of unsolicited manuscripts sent to editors each day. So, the likelihood of me "getting" published? My guess would be slim to none at this point. I figure the English degree will help with that, at least the credentials part. The rest? Well, we'll just have to wait and see.

One reason I like my instructor is because she challenges us, gets us to stretch our thinking - which is what you want to do if you're going to write fiction. For example, one assignment was to write a story about anything, in first-person, and from the perspective of the opposite sex. That was a little challenging, since I am not a man and do not know how men think. But to trying to convince the readers that the "voice" was a man's was sort of fun. For another assignment she had us write in pen across the top of our papers, "One topic I wouldn't be interested in writing about is ____________". I wrote down "Futuristic Warfare". Then, we had to spend 20 minutes in class writing a story with that theme. It was hard at first. But I found that I could work around the technicalities a bit and then it wasn't so bad.

The assignment that has been the hardest by far is this. 1) Write a 2-4 pg story on any topic. 2) Write yourself in as the main character, using your own name and keeping true to all of your physical characteristics and personality traits. 3) All other elements, ie setting, other characters, story line, etc., must be completely fictional. This may not be autobiographical in any way.

When I read the assignment, it didn't LOOK hard. But when I sat down to write it -- ahh! I always draw on my personal experiences for stories. And although my characters are similar to me in many ways, I usually make them better than me - more successful, more beautiful, more powerful, etc. So, essentially this is like plucking myself out of my current life and putting myself into a totally different plot and then writing about it.

It's due tomorrow. I am having a little bit of fun with it, but it's just a bit harder. Does it seem that hard to you? What story would you write yourself into if you could?

It's Hard!

When people learn that I am back in college after a {muffled sound}-year hiatus, they inevitably will ask what my major is. I always tell them Music and English. Many of them the reply with, "Oh. Well, that shouldn't be too hard then."

Shouldn't be Too hard? What? Do you think music is EASY? Well, it's not. In fact, I know several people who started off with the intentions of getting a music degree, and then switched majors because it was too hard! One of my friends switched from Music to English. Another from Music to Economics. Another from Music to Pharmacology, and yet another from Music to Nursing. Yeah~ Nursing. This is because -- get ready, here it comes -- MUSIC IS HARD.

I suppose that if someone really isn't aware of the intricacies of music, he or she would probably just assume that a Music Major gets to spend a lot of time singing or playing their instrument, write a few papers on Bach or Beethoven or Schubert, and perhaps perform in a recital or a concert, and so on and so forth. Wrong.

Actually, the only time I had to write on any composer was in my "Intro to Music/Music Appreciation" course, which is a Gen Ed course that all students take regardless of their major. While I do have to have a certain number of credits applied to group performance (such as the choir) and while it is highly recommended I take private instruction for either voice or an instrument, the HARD part comes down to two things: Theory and Musicianship.

Theory is the study of how music works. These are the basic "laws" of music. This included a plethora of terminology I have never even heard of and I've been singing and playing the piano since I was four! I mean, do YOU know what an Inverted Authentic Cadence is? Or how about the difference between an Augmented or Diminished chord? And what about those same chords in either first or second inversion? Yeah -- it's a little bit harder than just knowing where Middle C is on the piano or that one flat means you're in the key of F Major. I struggle with that class. It requires a ton of memorization and analytical homework. It is hard, and quite frankly, most of it I probably will not use after I graduate. But -- I have to learn it to get the degree.

What is even harder than Theory is Musicianship. Musicianship is handled in 2 parts: Sight-singing and Ear-training. This is a little trickier than learning to sing, "Doe, a deer, a female deer", although Solfege (do-re-mi) is required. Let me give you an example of the ear-training exams I have. These are what are known as "Dictation exams". The instructor will play a melody on the piano, usually around 8 bars or so. Without seeing what he has played, we then have to write down what we think we have heard. He then does the same with 3 and 4 part harmonies. I have to be able to write down the notes he's played in the correct sequence and rhythms without being able to watch him play it. For the sight-singing exams, we have about 1 minute to review 2 different pieces. Without being able to hear it, we must be able to determine if it's in a major or minor key, and then be able to sing it. We are graded on pitch and rhythm accuracy as well.

So yes, dear readers. Music is tough. I still love it and am determined to not let it discourage me. I love to write as well, which led to the decision to double-major. Sometimes I wish I could just write my way through college. Then, perhaps music wouldn't be so hard!

An Apology, Excuse, and Explanation

First off I want to apologize for not being very visible around the blogosphere as of late. But -- I can explain. Really, I can.

First off, I made it through finals back in December. I thought I would have a lot of time to blog and relax during the holiday break. Wrong. Because then I had to get my tree up and get my house ready for family to come and finish all of the last minute shopping and so on and so forth. I kept thinking that after Christmas I would have a little time before school started back up again. But, dear readers I got sick. I had a bad sinus infection and just felt like crap pretty much that entire week.

Then it was back to school. I am now officially done with all of my generals and 100% of my courses are devoted to my majors: Music and English. And don't be one of those people -- the ones that roll their eyes when I say "music". I don't know why people think music is easy. It's not. But that's an entirely a different post, of which I will indulge you at some point in the near future.

Anyway -- this semester I am taking four classes. I have "Intro to Writing Fiction", "Music Theory II", "Musicianship/Sight Singing & Ear-training", and "Private Piano Instruction". Mon-Thurs I leave straight from work around 5pm and head to campus for classes that start at 5:30pm. I am done by 8pm each night. And then I head home for about 2-3 hours of homework a night. On Fridays I take a long lunch hour for one class I have and then at some point throughout the weekend I try to catch up or tackle any homework or major writing assignments that I haven't gotten to.

On top of that, I have family stuff and church obligations as well. Man, no wonder I am tired! So, dear readers, don't take it personally if I haven't stopped by lately. I promise, I will be back to catch up.

First, I have to figure out when to take down the Christmas tree. Yes...it's still up. Yes, I know... don't say it.

Recently I happened to mention to someone that I needed to work on some blog posts. Her reply was a simple "Why don't you just stop blogging? Wouldn't that be easier?" ~GASP!~ Surely, she jests, right?

Some people blog to keep family members across the miles informed of their goings on. Others blog for self-therapy. Some use it as a journal, while others view it as purely entertaining. I agree. I do find the benefits of all of the aforementioned reasons. But mainly, I blog because I am a writer.

I read an article about a year ago that talked about the labels we give ourselves. Do we call ourselves a musician or someone who plays an instrument? Do we consider ourselves a crafter or do we say we just like crafts? The article went on to say that the way we label ourselves often times has a direct correlation to how successful we are in that particular area. I decided right then and there I was going to stop saying "someday I hope to be a writer" and instead say, "I am a writer."

It doesn't matter that I haven't actually been paid for anything yet. It doesn't matter that I haven't been selected by a publishing house (I want to avoid self-publishing if possible). What matters is that I write. Just like any skill that requires hours of practice to become good, the same is true with writing. If you ask a virtuoso how many hours a day she spends practicing her violin, she will say somewhere between 4 and 10 hours a day.

So, you see, this isn't "just blogging". It's how I "practice". It's how I hone my skill. And reading blogs helps me to gain perspective, learn techniques and pick up on some other creative ideas.

While I may have had to cut back on the amount of posts I have ready to publish or the amount of blogs I can visit on any given day, I can't see myself forsaking the writing any time in the near future.

That being said - I am off to my writing class! My one true hope is that when I walk in, my instructor will have chosen to wear a bra. I am sort of getting tired of seeing her girls grazing the top of her belt. Not a pretty look.

Till next time my faithful readers.

XOXO
Emma