Jungle Weeds and Snake Huntin'

So, as previously mentioned, I am not a gardener. Mowing the lawn is also not my specialty. As a single mom, I am so busy with a full time job, running kids here and there and everywhere on my own, that trying to keep up with the dishes is hard enough, let alone the yard. So, my oldest is supposed to mow the lawn. However, HE has been busy practically every night. So, the front lawn got mowed twice to the frequency of the back. I am ashamed to show you - and I am sure the neighbors were ashamed of me too, but here was my back yard after all that rain we had a few weeks back...

I know, I know. It's awful. But with my bad back, I was putting it off. Finally, one night, I decided it had to be done. We also have an evil monster tree that spews large 4-6' branches ALL.THE.TIME. Anyway - this particular evening, the oldest was at a band rehearsal, my middle one was sick, and my youngest couldn't help as she is highly allergic to grass and would have had to don a snow suit just to be out there. I needed to first clear the sticks so I could mow. I get moving and the next thing I know T, the boy from next door, has hopped the fence and practically BEGS me to let him help.

"Sure," I reply. And I sort of tell him about the stick situation. AS he gathers up sticks, I notice he analyzes each one, every now and again calling out, "This is a nice stick" and leaning it against the tree. I think he was "saving" them for something. Anyway - as he braves through my jungle of a back yard, he says to me at one point, "If you had any snakes in your yard, they would be right.over.here." I am like, "SNAKES??? EXCUSE ME??? DID YOU SAY S-S-SNAKES???"

For those who remember my TWO encounters last year - I don't "do" snakes. Ewww. So I reply to him, "Okay, then. I'll let YOU stay in that area." Agreed. Next thing I know, he looks as if he is HUNTING for snakes; as if he is HOPEFUL to find one.



I got the back yard finished, and as I am sitting here writing this post, realize it is past due again. Dang teenager and his extra curricular activities. I need a Lawn Boy! ( a hot, 20-something one, who might take his shirt off would be grand!) Anyway, I was able to get it done before dark, thanks to T and it looked much better afterwards, though I still had to collect a few more sticks.

Poop Tomatoes

I must confess - not only do I NOT have a green thumb... Have you ever seen someone's skin that has been badly frostbitten? How it's all crusted and charcoal-black? That'd be the equivalent to my gardening skills... to put it delicately, they suck.

So, what do they give the women at church for Mother's Day? A tomato plant.

Since I am not doing a garden this year, I figured I'd get a pot and some potting soil and give the thing a go. I perused the gardening section at my local gardening store and found some "organic" potting soil with "all natural" nutrients added. I figure it couldn't hurt. So, I get some.

We come home and transplant the tomato starter along with the Lettuce plant that my daughter has to grow for a summer school project. Anyway - as I am repotting the plants, PrettyPrettyPrincess sort of sniffs and says, "Ugh... something smells like dog poop!"

I say, "yeah - it's the potting soil."

She asks, "The dirt smells like Dog Poop?"

I reply, "Yes. What do you think the 'natural' nutrients are? It has manure in it."

"So, the dirt has poop in it?" She questions again, in disbelief.

"Yes," I answer with a slight chuckle.

"So - we are going to grow the tomatoes in POOP?" She is just beside herself at this point.

"Well," I begin, "yes...sort of."

"So --" she starts, still trying to wrap her brain around this. "We are going to have Poop Tomatoes? I am not eating those!"