Time to tell you all about the things I did NOT say or do this past week.
First of all, I did NOT actually do that thing in the kitchen wherein you utilize pots and pans and ingredients... what's that called? Oh yeah... COOKING! I did NOT actually make some home-cooked meals in between work and school and my children were NOT wondering if someone was coming over nor did one NOT ask, "Is this food for us?"
I also did NOT use frozen cookie dough, which I did NOT find in the depths of my freezer from some much-loathed, previous fund-raiser. However, I did NOT also secretly congratulate myself for buying this particular cookie dough as it was already pre-formed into perfectly portioned cookies, because if I was going to be guilted into spending $15 on cookies dough, I might as well do it in true Slacker-Mom style, right?
Anyhooters... I did NOT use this made-for-slacker-mom cookie dough to bake my sometimes-slightly-neglected-children cookies, which they did NOT devour. And when they praised me for my culinary skills, I did NOT smile and take all the credit. Nope I certainly did NOT because that would be somehow wrong. And I certainly do NOT think that the fact I was wearing my apron, and bringing the back of my hand to my forehead and sighing heavily had anything to do with their assumption that I had slaved away all evening for them. Nope, I certainly do NOT.
I did NOT go to school as usual, and I did NOT feel overwhelmed with homework and deadlines and getting A's. I was also NOT extremely stressed over work and finances and children getting good grades and my love-life (or lack thereof), and I certainly did NOT feel like I was in for a major-minor meltdown all week and I was NOT constantly fighting back the tears, which finally did NOT break through.
I did NOT get to go down to Park City for a Girls' Overnighter and we did NOT have a show-and-tell of sorts and we each did NOT vent a little and cry a little and laugh a lot. And we certainly did NOT eat as if we had never seen food before. I was NOT glad to have my elastic waist-band pants! It was NOT a great stress-reliever for me and the best part was that it was NOT free for me! w00t!
While at the Park City Marriott Mountain Side Resort, Ray-Ray & I did NOT take a midnight walk throughout the resort and we did NOT run into an extremely hot police officer. And I certainly did NOT play-flirt with the Po-Po and he did NOT think it was funny while Ray-Ray did NOT mumble something about never being able to take me anywhere! Hahaha!
Overall, my week did NOT start off like crap but end up like a cherry-topped hot fudge sundae with extra hot fudge!
Sooooo.... what did you NOT do this week?
P.S... Happy Columbus Day!