Monday, August 23, 2010

Not Me Monday

It's MONDAY!!! Time to tell you all of the things I did NOT do or say this past week...

I did NOT work all freakin week and as usual did NOT start to feel like getting laid off would be/could be an answer to prayer :)

I did NOT sub for the neighborhood Bunco night and I did NOT say anything inappropriate or say "That's What She Said" like at least a dozen times, and I surely did NOT talk about the "s" word or the fact that I haven't had "chocolate" in for-freakin-ever! I also did NOT catch the gals up on the latest mis-adventures of my lame-o but sorta crazy cuckoo-cachoo life :) Like, for example, I did NOT tell them about the Veggie Tale dude that is like sooo hot after me, and I am like... Dude. Put.It.Away. No thanks! hahaha! Also, I did NOT tell them about Mr. 11-years-older-and-already-married-and-divorced-twice-but-he-would-like-to-meet-me-anyway dude. Uhhh... can you say Red.Flag. ???

I also did NOT forget to register my Jr High kid for school and did NOT drag him to the less than underwhelmingly back-to-school night in which the A/C was conveniently left OFF, and I certainly did NOT feel irritated that the school fields were being used for pee-wee league football which meant the parking lot was full, and I did NOT have to park out in BFE next to the "Honey Pots" and I certainly did NOT have to trek across the freakin field in my heels as I did NOT have to rush right after work. And by the time I got to the stupid gym, I was NOT already feeling like a sweaty hog thrown into a herd of sheep as the multitude of other parental units shuffled their kids in and out of the classrooms. And all of this did NOT infuriate me, and I was NOT thinking a few less-than choice words. Nope, NOT me!

The next night I did NOT do a rinse & repeat with my daughter @ her school. I was NOT confronted by a room mother whom did NOT continually push me to sign up as a volunteer. And I finally did NOT have to explain my current situation - being a single mom, working full-time and going to school every M-Th. It is NOT a fact that there is only 1 other child in my daughter's 5th grade class that lives in a single-parent home. I do NOT think that sometimes they have a hard time wrapping their rich brains around my sitchyation ;)

Finally -- over the weekend I did NOT talk my daughter into going Camping with me up by Bear River and we did NOT have gorgeous views and she did NOT get to go kayaking and we did NOT roast marshmallows and have fun with friends. She also did NOT get her entire book read! On the way home, we did NOT stop off at Willard Bay and collect rocks at the beach and read our books and just totally relax. Nope, we certainly did NOT! Oh - and there was also NOT an "If-the-trailer's-rocking-don't-come-a-knockin'-moment" of which I did NOT certainly text my neighbor back home about... cuz that would be shameful :)

Saturday, I did NOT take the kids to Pizza Factory for dinner and we did NOT engage in some very enlightening conversation about THEIR expectations of MY [lack-of] love life. It was NOT interesting.

So -- what did you NOT do?

[PrettyPrettyPrincess & some of the other kids we went camping with...]

7 comments:

Susie said...

I did NOT can all last week:-)

Ruthykins said...

i am not glad that you got your daughter to go camping with you. i do not want to hear more about "veggie tale dude" and "older, twice-divorced dude" i am not anxious for those stories.

The Willeyes said...

I'm glad you had a fun weekend...even if the week had it's ups and downs...and don't forget a yummy dessert after the dumb lady at back to school night :)

Charlotte said...

I am not axiously awaiting your return so I can hear more about the love life conversation...

KiennaP said...

Yes, and I certainly did NOT hold a little snake at the camp out, and did NOT hold some baby frogs that some of the kids and I found. I most certainly did NOT get everything ready for the first day of school and did NOT have an AWESOME TEACHER!!! I am NOT craving for Edemame!

RhondaLue said...

Hey Just like Susie I did NOT can (64 lbs of chicken baby!)

I did not take my girl to college, I did not start cleaning her room out so ash can have space for all her stuff for ONCE!

I did NOT sign up to feed 30ish high school football players thursday. whoa.

I did NOT have a car break down on me, I did NOT finish the kids' dental appts FINALLY and I'm NOT golden for 6 more months.

Michelle said...

I'm dying to hear what said kids' expectations are...