Bully with a Badge

I went to go pick up the offspring from their father's the other night. I had to wait in the car a few minutes while they gathered their things. I blasted the heat so it would be nice and toasty for their arrival. *BIG MISTAKE*.

The heat triggered a bloody nose, which I thought was a sudden case of the mere sniffles as I backed out of the drive and headed down the street. By the time I got to the first stop sign, I realized it was a gusher and begged the kids to locate a tissue or napkin or something.

The blood gets all over my hands and shirt, and alas a napkin with only a little smidge of cheeseburger remnants is located. I do not care. I shove the thing up my nose and proceed to the next stop sign.

As I pull out of the subdivision onto the main road, lights are flashing behind me. I was being pulled over. I knew I wasn't speeding. And I knew I came to a complete stop back there. So, I figured I must have had a tail light out or something.

The officer approaches the vehicle and at first glance of my blood-stricken face, gasps slightly and asks, "Are you okay?" I respond, "Just a bloody nose."

He then asks for my driver's license, registration and proof of insurance, to which I oblige. He begins, "The reason I pulled you over ma'am, is because I ran your plates in my system and it shows that there is no insurance on the vehicle. Are you aware of that?"

"There should be insurance. My Ex is supposed to carry insurance on both vehicles," I explain, quickly wondering if the Ex has canceled my coverage without telling me.

"Well," the officer points out, "you're I.D. card is expired too. Do you have your new one with you?"

"Um," I stammer. "I doubt it. My Ex probably hasn't given it to me yet, but it's the same policy as what's on that card."

The officer tells me to stay put. He heads back to his car and remains there for a few minutes before returning. Then he says "You're right. The vehicle does have insurance coverage after all. But I am giving you a citation for not carrying current proof of insurance."

I was thinking, "What? First your computer says I don't have it but now it magically says I do?" In all honesty I don't believe he ever "ran my plates" to begin with. I think it is what he says to people just to pull them over. Then I think once they are pulled over he runs their plates and sees if there is anything he can cite them for. Besides, I was only at the stop sign for a moment. And the intersection is not well-lit. I have a hard time believing he had time to run my plates.

To top it off, he says that if I get an updated card and go down to the court in person (like I have time for that) then it *might* help me out. He follows that up with, "I need you to sign this citation. It isn't an admission of guilt, just a signature stating I explained it to you and that you have received it. Do you think you can sign it without getting blood all over my pen?"

I took his pen and while signing with my bloody hands replied, "I'll try."

The ironic thing is this. Earlier that day, I had to drive down to my sister's house in Happy Valley to pick up some stuff and then drive back home. It was dark. I was by myself, and it took about an hour each way. While driving back I noticed tons of idiot drivers. I remember secretly congratulating myself, "I'm a pretty good driver, if I do say so myself. *Never* been pulled over for speeding or even as much as a traffic citation."

Well, that will teach me!