We're counting down Mother's Day with posts on Mom this week. First up? The Mama's Boy! (I know -- this is more about Him than Her -- but we're doing it anyway, so get a grip!)
You may be dating someone you believe is a bit of a Mama's boy. Or perhaps you've already married him (if so, my condolences. Haha). Some women may feel like the simple fact their man calls or visits his mother on a daily basis makes him a "Mama's Boy." Wrong. Some men talk to their mothers every single day and have a completely healthy relationship with her.
Dr. Debra Mandel (author of "Dump that Chump: from Doormat to Diva in Only Nine Steps -- A Guide to Getting Over Mr. Wrong") says it is the QUALITY of their phone calls or visits which determines whether or not their relationship is healthy or unhealthy.
MEN - Listen Up! You might be a Mama's Boy if one or more of the following apply:
1) You fear that Mom will fall apart if you so much as move to the neighboring zip code.
2) You don't like to make a decision in life without her approval or validation.
3) You feel you cannot say "no" to her when she asks you to do things she should be asking her own husband to do (chores, mow lawn, service the car, etc.).
4) Even though you live on your own she comes over to cook and clean for you.
5) You cannot bring yourself to or are not willing to set boundaries with her even after your significant other has asked you to do so.
6) When anything significant in life happens, you tell your mother before your wife or girlfriend. Often times she is the first person you think of calling.
7) Instead of defending your girlfriend/spouse, you justify your mother's behavior. (And if you just said, "But--" then, yes. I am talking to you.)
Men -- if you are a Mama's Boy and have never been married, guess what? You'll probably never get married so long as your mother has this much influence over you. And if you are married, well then bless your wife's heart! "Experts" tell women when we see men like you we should R-U-N! Because it will never be a relationship of 2; it will forever be a threesome; you, her and your mother.
I can tell you from dating what I call a "mild" Mama's Boy, it sucks. So, men -- get help now! :)
And Ladies -- if you have a Mama's boy in your family, perhaps it's time for an intervention! Lol!
Now -- for some Mama's Boy Humor!