I was talking to a friend of mine the other day and had a realization. It's been a year, a year of being "commitment free".
When I was in middle school, I had little "flings". Not really Boyfriends in the sense of the word because I couldn't date. But boys who declared we were "going together". Then after a few weeks, I'd decide another boy was cuter and move on, hehe. Once I could start dating, there was always a certain someone at any given time; even if that time was only a week or two. My first serious boyfriend wasn't until my senior year. We broke up right before I went to college, and then I was single all of 7 months before getting engaged.
So, because I was young when I got engaged and then married, I never really had a REAL dating life or a lot of dating experience as a young single adult. I don't fret over it nor feel like I missed out; it just is what it is. Anyway, after my divorce, I hadn't planned on getting back into the dating scene for at least a year. Because I thought it would be good for me to learn how to be single; like for real.
But, I didn't quite make it a year. Things happened and in under a year I had a connnection with someone; someone I would have loved to have had a future with. It was back and forth, up and down, on again off again for two years. But it's no fun hanging on to something wherein the other person can't even express his feeling for you. I was tired of being "stuck", not progressing. The only thing sitting on the fence does is make you a good fence sitter. Moving on.
Now, maybe it's because my school schedule got really hectic. And I do think that is part of it. But I also think I realized through that experience that I give my heart over way too quickly. Because I am a "people person" and I love the affections of and attention from others it's hard for me to be single. So, I decided I needed to just learn how to be alone for a while. I still mingled and dated. But no commitments. Then again, maybe it's just the simple fact that no one asked, haha! (Well, not the right person anyway.)
So, now I can say it's been Five Thousand Twenty-Five Thousand Six Hundred Minutes since I've been committed to anyone. Yay me. Now --- I'd like a boyfriend, please! Hehe... kidding...sort of. Lol!
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