Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Bizarre... and Ridiculous

My current last name is uncommon and unusual. I mean, I'm just sayin' that there are those who think I should have jumped at the chance to change it when I got divorced. In all honesty, it never really bothered me back then. I am who I am and no one can change that. I get that. But that married name doesn't feel like me anymore. When I think of myself, it is my maiden name that I "FEEL". Not sure if that is making any sense... but moving on to the post at hand.

I started looking into the process here in the state of Utah to see how easy it would be to legally change my name. As with any legal process, there are rules. Check this out (from UtahCourts/Name Changes ):

  1. You must live in that county in which the name change petition will be filed for at least one year before the petition is filed.

  2. You must be 18 years of age or older.

  3. You cannot file while you are involved with any kind of lawsuit, or while you are on probation or parole.

  4. You must not be barred as a sex offender from name changes, under the provisions of section 77-27-21.5.

  5. You cannot file a name petition to avoid creditors, fines, or sentences in criminal actions.

  6. You may not use the name change process for an unworthy motive, or to commit fraud to the public.

  7. The court will not change your name to one that is bizarre, unduly lengthy, ridiculous, or offensive to common decency and good taste.

Okay, so it isn't that I have a problem with any of those "requirements". But seriously? Check out #7... I mean who determines what "bizarre" or "ridiculous" is. Some Judge??? And furthermore, when a mother NAMES her child, she is not placed with those same restrictions.

And how many out there "inherited" a name either thru birth or marriage that others may deem "ridiculous", "Bizarre" or even "unduly lengthy"???

Case in point, there are people I've actually encountered with the following last names:

Shufflebottom, Prettyontop, Aenis, Wiener, Asman, Cox, Fairbottam, Bumgarden, Smellie, Butts,... need I go on?

The funniest was when I worked with a Polynesian lady. Her last name was Peni (pronounced like Penny). She made the comment that she can never do like others and pluralize their last name. For example, the Browns, the Walkers, the Smiths... etc. She can't exactly sign her Christmas cards with a simple, Much Love, The Penis, now can she? Didn't think so.

And what about "ridiculous"? I mean, there are some parents who try to be cute, and yet a judge might consider it "ridiculous" if someone actually WANTED to choose the same name. Seriously, I have actually KNOWN people with the following names:

Robyn Hood, Dick Cox, Dick Hurtz, Ben Dover, Mysti Reign, Catherine Paw (whom everyone calls "Cat"),... and one that everyone jokes about is Phil McCracken, although there was a famous artist from like the 1920's by the same name! no joke! And what about Halle Berry? Think she was trying to be cute? Think there might be some judge out there that would consider that "ridiculous"? Probably...

Wouldn't it be ironic if someone who was trying to change their name to something slightly bizarre had a judge with a most unusual last name? Speaking of which, Utah has some judges with some very interesting last names.

A District Court Judge with the last name "Ballif". Do you think he gets respect from the Bailiff when he asks him to remove someone from the courtroom? Haha. We also have a Judge Faux. Hmmm, someone better check his credentials. We have a Judge Laycock and a Judge Goates too. Wonder if she speaks in Lay-Man's Terms or.... er, um, you get the idea. And if I had to stand in front of the honorable Judge Goates, I'd probably be tempted to say, "Nah... I'm just gettin' yer goat!" lol!

What about you? Do YOU know anyone with a "Bizarre" or "Ridiculous" name or even an Ironic name?


Susie said...

Recently, I heard that the Christmas family named their daughter Mary.

Ashley said...

If Chad Johnson from the Bengals can change his name to Chad 'Ochocinco', then I think you are safe to change your name to whatever the heck you want..... though I do love Ochocinco. :)

Sweet Sassy Molassy said...

About a dozen years ago I was a Webelos leader and a kid was named and called Michael Jackson. His parents called him Michael not Mike.

Puphigirl said...

I remember teasing you about your soon to be last name. That you wouldn't be able to name any daughters Lacey, Ivory, Silky, etc.

Alice in Wonderland said...

I laughed when I read this, because I know what your surname is, but then I thought that I once knew a Hazel Knutt and a Justin Case!
I went to school with a Yvonne Wood and an Yvonne Might, and they both lived up to their names!

Vickie said...

I knew a kid with the name Johnny Johnson. Really, couldn't the parents give him a different first name.

Celebrities are the worst!!

pinkelephant said...

This was just soo funny! I laughed when I read everyone's comments too! I recently heard about this Rich family who named their daughter Cash. Cash Rich?? Better than Cash Gone I guess.

Charlotte said...

I have a great grandpa named Carl Carlson. Also met a boy on summer vacation one year named Rusty Cannon.

RhondaLue said...

Ohhhhh dude, if my last name was Peni...I'd have a JOLLY GOOD TIME WITH IT! *snicker*

Those are some funny names! didn't Gweneth paltro name her kid APPLE. That's just weird.

RhondaLue said...

LOL @ Puphi! (because I know your last name)

Jed's sister named her boy/girl twins Mary and Joseph. Am I the only one that thinks that's inappropriate? LOL