Not Me Monday

As it is NOT Monday, I am NOT going to share with you the things I did NOT say or do this past week and I will certainly NOT be including some photos.

I did NOT participate in a color swap from another blog and the colors were NOT brown & blue. I did NOT receive this package from MY swap partner, Melody over at Three boys and a dog . She was NOT an awesome swap partner and I did NOT receive a notebook covered in cute paper, ribbon, a fashionista emery board, buttons, other scrapbooking supplies, soap, a magnet, candle holders and a cute little sign. Nope, NOT me.
Tuesday, when I went to run errands during my lunch hour, a Dragonfly did NOT totally land on my foot in the Tar-Jay parking lot. I did NOT think that was cool and I certainly did NOT snap a pic of it.

Then Tuesday night I did NOT tell my children we were going to the public library and they did NOT keep asking why because I had NOT taken them into one in years and they did NOT understand why people might like going unless they were assigned to read a book by a teacher. I totally did NOT feel like a bad parent. My oldest and youngest were NOT excited and took off to search for some very cool books while my middle child did NOT mope around and follow me and ask on numerous occasions when we would be leaving. I finally did NOT inform him that he needed to go and find his own books to check out and that he MUST stop following me. He did NOT reply with a whiny, "Why?" and I did NOT state, "Because I am going into the women's restroom." I did NOT use the restroom partly as a way to escape my shadow and partly as a way to force him to journey into the library on his own. I did NOT come out of the library to find him standing at the end of one row giggling. I did NOT tell him he had to be quiet and I did NOT ask him what was sooo funny and he did NOT stand there pointing to THIS sign and continue giggling.

He then did NOT say, "I didn't know they had a section specially designated for the oversized children." Nope, he certainly did NOT say that. I of course did NOT start laughing and did NOT have to dig out my phone to snap this lovely pic.

I did NOT have to drive down to Salt Lake on Thursday to pick up my teenager and his friend who were NOT enjoying the afternoon at a water park, which was NOT courtesy of his orthodontic practice. On the way back home I did NOT decide to drive through downtown and I did NOT happen to see this gypsy trio waking the streets. One woman did NOT have a huge "Mad Hatter" type hat on, while carrying a coffee can of what looked like incense sticks, while the man in the group was NOT sporting a bandanna and carrying an Ironing Board. You heard me correctly, he was NOT carrying an Ironing Board. For the life of me I did NOT wonder what on earth that was for.

My lovely pink tweezers did NOT go MIA this past week, and I was NOT irritated as I have this hair that has NOT decided to grow in on my cheek, which I have been perpetually tweezing over the last year or two. In the absence of my tweezers, I did NOT feel this hair grow in and while sitting in my car one afternoon did NOT flip down the visor and instead of just the one hair I did NOT notice THREE!!! This did NOT make me wonder if this whole time I had actually been tweezing three hairs, which I thought was just one that grew rather quickly. I was NOT in total disgust with myself.

See here???
What? You can't see them??? Look a little closer...
...a little closer...

I'm hideous! Look away!!!

Ok, well, I finally did NOT find a set of tweezers and though not as good as my girly pink ones, I was NOT able to tweeze them and finally did NOT feel I was presentable in public.

Friday night I did NOT attend the Free Movie in the Park with my friend and we did NOT watch the family-friendly film, "Outlaw Trail", which was NOT a fictional take of what really happened to Butch Cassidy. There were NOT many corny parts but I still did NOT think it was cute and funny and she and I did NOT totally laugh. I do NOT think my kids would enjoy this independent film which was NOT filmed here in Utah, and I would NOT recommend it to anyone who enjoys family-films free of swears.

By the way...I will NOT be abstaining from blogging this week. Instead, I will be [finally] catching up from vacation, and reading all of YOUR blogs. I hope they are NOT awesome, because NEXT week, I will NOT be posting links to YOUR blogs, and what were MY favorite posts to read of the week!

So....what did you NOT do this week?