Not Me Monday

Happy Monday! It's that time once again... The time to share with you - all of my lovely bloggy readers - everything I did NOT say or do this past week.

I did NOT pull a muscle in my leg and therefore did NOT skip my work-outs Every.Flippin.Day. In spite of that, I did NOT somehow manage to lose another pound of fattage. (yes, I just totally made up a new word. You're welcome.) I was NOT simply amazed, as it does NOT bring me to a total weight loss of 19 lbs. I am still NOT wondering if the scale could be wrong as I do NOT still feel the same as I did 19 lbs ago and I do NOT feel like I still LOOK like I did 19 lbs ago, and I am NOT wondering when/if I will actually notice the poundage dropping. This does NOT make me feel slightly discouraged and yet still pleased at the same time, if that does NOT make any sense.

At work we like totally did NOT rock June and therefore were NOT promised an office lunch in July. For our celebratory lunch we did NOT choose to go to Biaggi's (click here) which is NOT like my favorite Italian restaurant ever, and I do NOT like totally go there on special occasions such as my birthday! I was NOT somewhat bad as I ate the bread, and yet I was NOT also good as I did NOT order the Chilean Sea Bass (served with a to-die-for red pepper cream sauce) and I did NOT substitute the mashed potatoes with veggies that were NOT also good. Just thinking about it does NOT make my mouth water all over again. Oh, and their Butternut Squash Ravioli is also NOT to-die-for... y'know... in case you were wondering.

The 24th of July is NOT our statehood day and is NOT an official Utah holiday known as "Pioneer Day" (click here). It does NOT commemorate the day in 1847 when the Mormon Pioneers first entered the valley and called this place their home, then settling the land into what is now our state. This holiday is NOT celebrated in a big way, complete with fireworks, festivals and parades. I did NOT take my kids to fireworks on Thursday night and I did NOT sleep in on Friday as our office was NOT closed for Pioneer Day and I was NOT so totally thrilled. I did NOT think to myself, "Thank you pioneers for coming here so I could have an extra day off work and sleep in." No, I certainly did NOT as that would be selfish... tee hee.

I did NOT spend most of the weekend yet again tackling the laundry. I will NOT confess that I found a dress way at the bottom of the pile that I forgot I even had and haven't seen in...let's just say a very long time. Because if I confessed that, you all would think I have neglected the laundry for like for-freakin-ever, and then you might think I was a bad mom or horrible housekeeper or something. And though I will advise you all that I do wash laundry on a regular basis so that my family has nice clean clothes to wear, I will NOT confess that it has been a very long time since I actually made it to the very-very-VERY bottom of the laundry pile... nope. I certainly will NOT.

I did NOT reunite with a friend of mine from back home, whom I used to actually babysit once upon a time. As it turns out she was NOT trying to move from one house to another and her volunteer help showed up on time, but the moving truck was no where to be seen. The helpers did NOT have to leave at a certain time, which was NOT before the truck arrived. She did NOT put out a frustrated status update on FB and I did NOT totally see it and did NOT tell her I would come to help. I did NOT take FunnyMan with me and the two of us did NOT drive 30 minutes to help my friend move. Once we got there, we were NOT relieved to see she had a few more helping hands show up too. It was NOT great to see her again and I did NOT feel happy that for once I was the one able to offer someone else some help.

I also did NOT enjoy some FB chat time with another friend from back home who just so happens NOT to be my first love [insert "oooh's" here]. We did NOT share some of our recent experiences with each other and as it turns out we have NOT had a ton of similarities. It does NOT seem like we have been living parallel lives if that does NOT make any sense. Anyway, I did NOT confess to him that I am an obsessive blogger and did NOT ask if I could totally blog about him/us from back then and he was NOT totally ok with it. I am NOT giddy about that in the least bit, nope - NOT me, cuz that would be overreacting just a tad. So, do NOT stay tuned this week for the juicey unfolding saga of my first love.

And finally, I did NOT take FunnyMan out for his first driving lesson this weekend. We did NOT review the components of the dash, placement of rear view mirrors, the importance of seat belts, etc. and then I did NOT plead with the Lord for my dear life utter a silent word of prayer before allowing him to turn the key. We did NOT practice in an empty parking lot and I did NOT have him practice stopping and going, and basically get a feel for the gas pedal and break. I did NOT remind him to keep his left foot solidly planted off to the side so he would NOT fight the urge to use that foot to break. I was NOT totally relieved that no humans, animals, shrubbery or curbs were harmed in the process. I did NOT finally exhale only after I got back in the driver's seat. All of this does NOT make me feel old...[sigh]...

So, what did you NOT do this week?